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Historyjki/Kawały

 

"Whatcha lookin' at, Tommy?" \ |||| \ oo | (^o ) \\\\ (\//\_/\\ _( oo_ \/\___// _____ (| | |) _| | |) __ |__|__| |_|_| ________\\//___ (_)(_) ____ _______(_(_)___________ jro ****************************** ****************************** "Shhh... Sit down, Fatty. I found this Playboy magazine. Shut-up, and I'll let you see |||| it." oo | \ (^- ) //// //\_/\\ _oo )_ \\___// _____ (| | |) _| | |) __ |__|__| |_|_| ________\\//___ (_)(_) ____ _______(_(_)___________ jro &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& ' . \\\\ ' |||| ' _( oo_ XX | _____ (| | |)^O ) _______ |__|__| \_/\\ ________\\//_ /^\/^\\_____ _______(_(_)__(_)(_)""_ jro ***************************** ***************************** "Wow, Tommy. That looks almost human." \ //// |||| _-- )_ OO | _____ (| | |)^O ) _______ |__|__| \_/\\ ________\\//_ /^\/^\\_____ _______(_(_)__(_)(_)""_ jro finisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinis finisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinis

. . ) . . . * . . . . . . .' . '. * . . ' .' . . __ . .' ______ __ | o' | | | | | | | | | | | | ___| |_ __|_______________________|__..--~~~~ jro ~--. /|\ / \ / | \ / \ \|/ / | \ / \ / | \ "Boy, are you ever / \ a genius, Harry! Only / | \ a total IDIOT like YOU, / would run out of gas in / ____ | the MIDDLE OF NOWHERE, / / __) ___ at THREE IN THE MORNING!" / \(~oo | (___) / / _\_-/_ (_o o_) / / \/ \ | (_\O/_)(\ \ / / / \ \ //\_/\\// \ \_\ | / //(_ _)\/ \ \_)___|/ \\/ \ \ \|/ / | (/_____\ / /| | | |\ \ \ \| | | | \ \ \__\_| |_| \_\ (__]__) <_> /\_> % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % . . ) . . . * . . . . . . .' . '. * . . ' .' . . ÝÝÝÝ _.---._ÝÝ .ÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝ .ÝÝÝÝ * Ý *ÝÝÝÝÝÝ .'ÝÝÝÝÝÝ '. ÝÝÝÝÝ _.-~===========~-._ ÝÝÝÝ (___________________) ÝÝÝÝ .ÝÝ * __ÝÝ ÝÝÝ \_______/Ý ______ __ | | | | | | | | | | | | | ___| |_ __|_______________________|__..--~~~~ jro ~--. /|\ / \ / | \ / \ \|/ / | \ / \ "It's probably a HUNDRED / | \ miles to a gas station! / \ This wind is RUINING MY / | \ HAIR! Why I married a / FOOL like YOU, I'll NEVER / ____ | know! My parents TOLD ME / / __) ___ you were no good!..." / \(~oo | (___) / / _\_-/_ (_o o_) / / \/ \ | (_\O/_) \ / / / \ \ //\_/\\ \ \ | /_/ //(_ _)\\ \ \|___(_/ \\/ \// \ \|/ | \ (/_____\) | |\ \ / /| | | |/ / \ \| | |_/__/ \_|_| (__[__) <_<_> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * "We only have room for one specimen, "Let us take the small, Dtlxvr. Which shall high-decible one, Ftxbp. we take?" It has less mass." \ _.-'~~~~'-._ / . .-~ \__/ \__/ ~-. . .-~ (oo) (oo) ~-. (_____//~~\\//~~\\______) _.-~` `~-._ /O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O\ * \___________________________________/ \x x x x x x x/ . * \x_x_x_x_x_x/ jro @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ @ . * _.-'~~~~'-._ . .-~ \__/ \__/ ~-. . .-~ (oo) (oo) ~-. (_____//~~\\//~~\\______) _.-~` `~-._ /O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O\ \___________________________________/ \x x x x x x x/ \x_x_x_x_x_x/ :|. | ' ." | |. '. |:| Zzuzz! | : |:. ;| "Ohmygosh, a . | : .| : flying saucer! | . | : .|| Delores -- NO!" : |. | . :: Zzuzz! \ ___ |.: |. :. | / _) | :|___ |:| | (~o (\.|(___) /) _\/_/_ \\(_O O_)// Zzuzz! / \ .\(_\O/_)/: / / \ \ :|\/\_/\/ | \ | | / | .(_ _): | \|____|/ .| / \ |: |_ _| | /_____\.| !!!EEEEKKKK!!! | | | : .| | | . | | | . | | | || |_|__| | :|_|_| .: jro [__[__) .: <_|_> .| jrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojro jrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojro . . ) . . . * . . . . . . . * . . ' . . ÝÝÝÝ _.---._ÝÝ .ÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝÝ .ÝÝÝÝ * Ý *ÝÝÝÝÝÝ .'ÝÝÝÝÝÝ '. ÝÝÝÝÝ _.-~===========~-._ ÝÝÝÝ (___________________) ÝÝÝÝ .ÝÝ * __ÝÝ.' ÝÝÝ \_______/Ý .' ______ __ | .' .' | | | | | ' | | | | | | | ___| |_ __|_______________________|__..--~~~~ jro ~--. /|\ / \ / | \ / \ \|/ / | \ / \ / | \ / \ / / "BRING MY WIFE BACK, / __ YOU COSMIC KIDNAPPERS!" / / \ / / (\__/) | \ / _\__/_ \ / / \ | \ / / / / / \ \ | \_\ \ \|____\_) \ \|/ | \ | |\ \ | |/ / |_/__/ (__[__) 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 . . ) . . . * . . . . . . o . .' * . . ' .' . . __ . .' ______ __ | '. | | | | | .' | | | | | | | ___| |_ __|_______________________|__..--~~~~ jro ~--. /|\ / \ / | \ / \ \|/ / | \ / \ / | \ / \ / | \ / _ \ / /_\ | \ / \_/ \ / / \ | \ / \|_|/ \ / ||| | \ / ||| \ / (_|_) | \ / \ \|/ # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # . . ) . . . * . . . . . . . * . . ' . . __ . ______ __ | | | | | | | | | | | | | ___| |_ __|_______________________|__..--~~~~ jro ~--. /|\ / \ / | \ / \ \|/ / | \ / \ / / "Cripes, that WAS stupid! What / if they'd actually HEARD me / and brought her BACK!" / ____ / / / __) \ / \(~oo | \ / _\_o/_ \ / / \/ \ | \ / / / \ \ \ \ | /_/ \ \|___(_/ \ \|/ | \ | |\ \ | |/ / |_/__/ (__[__) thatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsall thatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsall

___ _______ /__/| /_____ /|| || || ||||[]|| ___|| ||||==||_________ / ||_____||||__|| / / /_______\/|__|/ /\ / _________ / / /=========/ / / \__/___\__/_/ / /____( )___( )____________/ // //~~\\ //~~\\ jro\\ // \\__// \\__// \ \\ //\\ //\\ \ |||| |||| "So, Vzxall, what is this (_)(_) (_)(_) example of Earth technology?" [[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[ ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] ___ _______ /__/| /_____ /|| || || ||||[]|| "This device is the primitive Earth protoplasm beings' idea of a "computer." \ / /_______\/|__|/ /\ \/ _________ / /\ /=========/ / / \__/___\__/_/ / /____( )___( )____________/ // //~~\\ //~~\\ \\ // \\__// \\__// jro\\ //\\ //\\ |||| |||| (_)(_) (_)(_) ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] [[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[ ___ _______ /__/| /_____ /|| || || ||||[]|| ___|| ||||==||_________ / ||_____||||__|| / / /_______\/|__|/ /\ / _________ / / /=========/ / / \__/___\__/_/ / /____( )___( )____________/ // //~~\\ //~~\\ jro\\ // \\__// \\__// \ \\ //\\ //\\ "Excellent! With this, we |||| |||| should be able to interpet (_)(_) (_)(_) their entire planetary network!" ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] [[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[ ___ _______ /__/| /_____ /|| || || ||||[]|| ___|| ||||==||__________ / ||_____||||__|| / / /_______\/|__|/ /\ / _________ / / //}=======/ / / \__/\\_\__/_/ / /____( )//_( )____________/ // //~~ / //~~\\ \\ // \\__/ \\__// \ jro\\ //\\ //\\ \ |||| |||| "Turn the device on." (_)(_) (_)(_) [[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[ ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] ___ _______ /__/| /_____ /|| || || ||||[]|| ___|| ||||==||_________ / ||_____||||__|| / / /_______\/|__|/ /\ / _________ / / /=========/ / / \__/___\__/_/ / /____( )___( )____________/ // //~~\\ //~~\\ \\ // \\__// \\__// \ jro\\ //\\ //\\ \ |||| |||| "Ah, yes! Their News Exchange. (_)(_) (_)(_) Now we will learn all they know!" ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] [[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[ ___ _______ /__/| /_____ /|| || || ||||[]|| "What is this information, Wcxliz? It does not appear to be News, at all." \ / /_______\/|__|/ /\ \/ _________ / /\ /=========/ / / \__/___\__/_/ / /____( )___( )____________/ // //~~\\ //~~\\ \\ // \\__// \\__// jro\\ //\\ //\\ |||| |||| (_)(_) (_)(_) ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] [[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[ ___ _______ /__/| /_____ /|| || || ||||[]|| ___|| ||||==||_________ / ||_____||||__|| / / /_______\/|__|/ /\ / _________ / / /=========/ / / \__/___\__/_/ / /____( )___( )____________/ // //~~\\ //~~\\ \\ // \\__// \\__// \ jro \\ //\\ //\\ \ |||| |||| "It says... "This is not a scam, (_)(_) (_)(_) send $5 and make $50,000 in one week, guaranteed." [[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[ ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] ___ _______ /__/| /_____ /|| || || ||||[]|| ___|| ||||==||_________ "Hhmmmm..... Foiled again! These dastardly Terran Earth protobeings have encoded all vital information behind some MLM garbage!" \ /=========/ / / \__/___\__/_/ / /____(oo)___(oo)____________/ // //~~\\ //~~\\ \\ // \\__// \\__// jro \\ //\\ //\\ |||| |||| (_)(_) (_)(_)

___( () )___ ___( )__ * _( ( ( )jro ) __) ( () ))__ ( _()________) (____)__)_____) * (_____) * * __ * __ * * \_/__\_/ \_/__\_/ _______/__\/__\_______ _______/__\/__\_______ \ \ "Well, what do you think, Blue Two? Here we are, flying the world's most sophisticated fighter." *_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_* _*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_ "We're all alone in the night sky, and there's nothin' in the universe can track these stealth babies..." / / "Yea, it's too cool." | / | / / \ / \ / //V\\ //V\\ / \|/ \ / \|/ \ /=/ v \=\ /=/ v \=\ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / \ / /| |\ \ / /| |\ \ / / \\ // \USA\ / / \\ // \USA\ \ / \\ // \ / \ / \\ // \ / \/ / \ / \ \/ \/ / \ / \ \/ / / V \ \ / / V \ \ |_/ \_| |_/ \_| jro JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO ORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJ __________ ___ ___( () )___ ___( )__ * _( ( ( ) ) __) ( () ))__ ( _()________) (____)__)_____) * (_____) * * "I don't know how we are supposed to * finish this survey, Whxglitz, with all these silly, Proto-Earth-Beings * flying around up here all night!" / .-'~~~~'-. / .-~Ą\__/ \__/`~-. .-~ (oo) (oo) ~-. (_____//~~\\//~~\\______) _.-~` `~-._ /O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O=O\ * \___________________________________/ JRO \x x x x x x x/ * \x_x_x_x_x_x/ thatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsall thatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsall

______________________________ * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * _____ ______________ | | || | | | || | | |______||______| | | || | ()| | || | | |______||______| | /______________/ | __((())__ _____|___________|_))- -((_|__ | ((\-/)) | | /\~V~/\ | |//(_ _)\\| /// \ / \\\ %%%% /_\)_/ \_(/_\ (\%%%oo | |_/_____\_| | \%%%o/ | | \ \\ \ | | \/~~\ | | / // / | | / /____\|_|_/_//_/__|_| / |||| \_)\_) / (_)(_) "Momma! Daddy's outside, an' he's sayin' all them bad words again!" uhohuhohuhohuhohuhohuhohuhohuhohuhoh uhohuhohuhohuhohuhohuhohuhohuhohuhoh ______________________________ * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * _____ ______________ | | || | | | || | | |______||______| | | || | ()| | || | | |______||______| | /______________/ | __((())__ _____|___________|_))o o((_|__ | ((\o/)) | / | /\~V~/\ | "I know he is, |//(_ _)\\| dear." /// \ / \\\ %%%% /_\)_/ \_(/_\ %%%oo | |_/_____\_| | %%%-/ | | \ \\ \ | | //~~\ | | / // / | | (/____\|_|_/_//_/__|_| |||| \_)\_) (_)(_) JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO ______________________________ * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * _____ ______________ | | || | | | || | | |______||______| | | || | ()| | || | | |______||______| | /______________/ | __((())__ _____|___________|_))o o((_|__ | ((\-/)) | "Well? Aren't | /\~V~/\ | you goin' to go |//(_ _)\\| bawl him /// \ / \\\ out?" %%%% /_\)_/ \_(/_\ \ %%%oo | |_/_____\_| | %%%o/ | | \ \\ \ | | //~~\ | | / // / | | (/____\|_|_/_//_/__|_| |||| \_)\_) (_)(_) ?????????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????????? ______________________________ * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * _____ ______________ | | || | | | || | | |______||______| | | || | ()| | || | | |______||______| | /______________/ __((())__ "No, not this ___|_))o o((_|__ time, sweetie. | ((\o/)) | You see, Daddy's | /\~V~/\ | just working on |//(_ _)\\| the car." /// \ / \\\ %%%% /_\)_/ \_(/_\ %%%OO | |_/_____\_| | %%%-/ | | \ \\ \ | | //~~\ | | / // / | | (/____\|_|_/_//_/__|_|jro |||| \_)\_) (_)(_) finifinifinifinifinifinifinifinifini finifinifinifinifinifinifinifinifini

_______________________________ _______________________________| EER ICE POP| | ___________| | | __________________ Restrooms | || ------> | || Key Inside| || | || | || _________________________ . || / ___________ ______ ____\ | || / / | || \ | || / /____________|______||______\_|________. _________________|| || | || | |) _________________|| || _________\ || | _______ \ (_|____/.' _ '.\\_____||_______|_/ _ \_) ___________________________ : (_) : : (_) : '. .' '. .' """"" """"" * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * "I'll have it open for you in just a second, Sis... I don't know why they lock these things, anyway." ___ __________ __________ \ || || _ || || ___ \ || Ladies || || Men || __ __ \ || || __ || || || || || || _ __ //// || || || %%% oo ) ()|| __ || ()|| __ %%oo \o/ /)~ || || || %%-/ _ / \/\// || _ || || __ //~\ //\_/\/ || || || (/___\ (/ //\\ || || || _ ||| __ // // || _ || || (_)_)_____(_)(_)_______||_____||________||____ jrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojro jrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojro "I think they're afraid __ someone will clean them." ___ / __________ __________ _ __ / || || _ || || ___ / _ || Ladies || || Men || __ _ / || || __ || || / || || || || _ __ //// || || || %%% oo ) ()|| __ || ()|| __ %%oo \-/ /)~ || || || %%o/ _ / \/\// || _ || || __ //~\ \\_/\/ || || || (/___\ (||| || || || _ ||| __ ||| || _ || || (_)_)_______(_)_)______||_____||________||____ finisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfin nisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinis

___________________________ ______/ /____ |__|__| |__|__| _|__|_|\\ () |_|__|_ |__|__| [] ( ) * |__|__| _|__|_| * ( ( () ( ) ) |_|__|_ |__|__| ( \\\\()////( ) |__|__| _|__|_| ( ) ( ( ( oo oo ) ( )) |_|__|_ |__|__| ( () () \-/ \-/( ) ())|__|__| _|__|_|(___)____(____(____)____)|_|__|_ |__|__|| ||__|__| _|__|_|| ||_|__|_ |__|__||_______________________||__|__| /_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ /_/_/_/_/_/_###########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ /_/_/_/_/_/_###########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ JRO_/_/_/_/_###########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ ....................................... ....................................... ___________________________ ______/ /______ |__|__| |__|__| |___|_|\\ "Uh oh" |_|__|_ %%%|__| [] () * ( ) |__|__| oo%_|_| * ( ( () ( ) ) |_|__|_ -/%|__| ( ( \\\\()////( ) |__|__| ))_|_| ( ) )( ( oo oo ) ( )) |_|__|_ ||__| ( () () \-/ \o/( ) ())|__|__| ===\|_|(___)____(____(_____(___)|_|__|_ ____\_|| ||__|__| |\ \_|| ||_|__|_ |_\ \||_______________________||__|__| |/_\_\_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_//_/_/_/_/ __)/_\__)_/_###########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ /_/_/_/_/_/_###########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ JRO_/_/_/_/_###########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ ...................................... ...................................... _"Aahh! I don't believe this! ______/ What have you done, poured____ |__|__| in all the bubble bath! __|__| _|__|_|\\ Just look at this mess!"|__|_ |__|__| [] * ( ) () * |__|__| _|__|_| (%%%) ( ( () ( ) ) |_|__|_ |__|__|/%%%%%\ \\\\()////( ) |__|__| _|__|_|\%%%%%/( ( oo oo ) ( )) |_|__|_ |__|__| \ / () \-/ \-/( ) ())|__|__| _|__|_|(/===\___(____(____(____)|_|__|_ |__|__|/_____\ ||__|__| _|__|_||| | | ||_|__|_ |__|__||| | |__________________||__|__| /_/_/_/_|_|_|_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ /_/_/_/(_)/(_)#########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ /_/_/_/_/_/_###########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ JRO_/_/_/_/_###########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ ....................................... ....................................... _"Nah, mom. What do you ______/ think we are, idiots? We ____ |__|__| ran out of bubble bath __|__| _|__|_|\ yesterday. This stuff is __|__ |__|__| [] laundry 'tergent." |__|__| _|__|_| (%%%) ( ( () ( ) ) |_|__|_ |__|__|/%%%%%\ \\\\()////( ) |__|__| _|__|_|\%%%%%/( ( oo oo ) ( )) |_|__|_ |__|__| \ / () \o/ \-/( ) ())|__|__| _|__|_|(/===\___(____(____(____)|_|__|_ |__|__|/_____\ ||__|__| _|__|_||| | | ||_|__|_ |__|__||| | |__________________||__|__| /_/_/_/_|_|_|_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ /_/_/_/(_)/(_)#########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ /_/_/_/_/_/_###########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ JRO_/_/_/_/_###########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ ........................................ ........................................ __________________________ ______/ /_____ |__|__| * |__|__| _|__|_|\\ * ( ) * ) ) |_|__|__ |__|__| %%%%%( ) * ( ) * ) |__|__| _|__|_|%%o o%% ( ( () ( ) ) |_|__|_ |__|__|%%\-/%% \\\\()////( ) |__|__| _|__|_//(_ _)\\ ( oo oo ) ( )) |_|__|_ |__|__\\\ ///) \-/ \-/( ) ())|__|__| _|__|_|(/===\)__(____(____(____)|_|__|_ |__|__|/_____\ ||__|__| _|__|_||| | | ||_|__|_ |__|__||| | |__________________||__|__| /_/_/_/_|_|_|_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ /_/_/_/(_)/(_)#########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ /_/_/_/_/_/_###########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ JRO_/_/_/_/_###########_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ finisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinis finisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinis

[O] [O] [O] ____ /` ___ || ___/O|__\_/_ /___\ || /_____\__/___/|x===o| || ______(o)_______(o)||___||________||________ JRO ________ ~.>\` ' ________ . ' \__[]__/ ' ^^ . . \[]____/ ' //\__/\\ ' ((()) /_/o\\\ '. ( o__o ) aa(((( <_ )/ \ __ / . ' \-(((( . \__/ . . __\__/___ / /\\( / \ /| \||/ |\ ( ( // . ||PD|| ' . / | \/ @| \ \ // || || / |_ __ |\ \ /[__] ' || || . . \____|//_| |/ / /_____\ ||__|| | |\/ | | | . | / \| |_______|/ | | | |_\\\| . | | . ' |_|_| | | .' | | | <-<--/ | | | | | ' ' . ' | | ' ' . |__|__| |___| (__) (__) . ' (____) . "I agree, Gilhouey, but I don't know how to write her up,... She says she's "Certain the light was green, becuase she knows it was when she came through here, yesterday".......

____ / ___) \( oo \ -/ _/\/\_ __ |/____\| ______________ |/___/|| ___|___||____ "No, dear. Daddy's /_/_\_/\ /| got to finish some /______\/ / | work he didn't have ___________/ | time to do at the | | office. He'll play _______ / with you, later." ____ / _____) / \ ( o o\ / \_\ ^/ /\\~/\_______ _____/ / \_____(~\ ~~~~/ /( )~~~~/// --* \ \ \ /--*---| ))) \ \/ \ | oo ) _____/~/_____\_____| \-/ ________\ \ \____| // \\ / / / | \\_// =======/__/__/=====| //\\ jro \___)__) || (_)(_) 0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 ____ (___ \ oo )/ \- / _/\/\_ __ |/____\| ______________ |/___/|| ))) ___|___||___oo ) /_/_\_/\ /|/ /______\/ / |\ ___________/ || | |_) _______ / ____ / _____) \ ( - -\ \_\ ^/ /\\~/\_______ _____/ / \_____(~\ ~~~~/ /( )~~~~/// --* \ \ \ /--*---| \ \/ \ | _____/~/_____\_____| ________\ \ \____| / / / | =======/__/__/=====| jro \___)__) || JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO ____ ' ' / ___) \( -- ' \ -/ _/\/\_ __ |/____\| ______________ |/___/|| ___|___||____ /_/_\_/\ /| /______\/ / | ___________/ | "I thought Daddy was | | ah ol' insurance _______ / 'juster, Mom. When ____ / _____) did he start workin' \ ( O O\ on these porno web \_\ ^/ sites?" /\\~/\_______ \ _____/ / \_____(~\ \ ~~~~/ /( )~~~~/// --* \ \ \ /--*---| ))) \ \/ \ | oo ) _____/~/_____\_____| \o/ ________\ \ \____| // \\ / / / | \\_// =======/__/__/=====| //\\ jro \___)__) || (_)(_) that'sallthat'sallthat'sallthat'sallthat'sall that'sallthat'sallthat'sallthat'sallthat'sall

_________________________________________________ ________________________ jro|\ | AIM HIGH | | \ ______ | __ | | \ | |fly the \_/__\_/ F117 | | \ | | _______/__\/__\_______ | | | stealth | "Now this is an | | United States Air Force| educational |[] |________________________| experience!" \ () | / | \ | \\\\ ____ | |\ | | ( oo |\___\ | | \| | \o/ ||___| | \\ | | (/_\)/____\_ | \\| ______|__________________________ |\ ||_____|\__| | \__________\ \ \ | | \ \|__________| \ 888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888 888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888 _________________________________________________ ________________________ jro|\ | AIM HIGH | | \ ______ | __ | | \ \ | |fly the \_/__\_/ F117 | | \ \()) | | _______/__\/__\_______ | | |oo((| | stealth | | |o/)) | United States Air Force| | |\ |~/) \ ] |________________________| | | \ )|// \ | | \ |/\ | "What are you doing, \\\\ ____ | |\ | |__\ | Marvin?" ( oo |\___\ | | \| | \ | \-/ ||___| | \\ | |\ \ | (/_\)/____\_ | \\| | \ \|__________________________ |\ ||_____|\__| \| \__) | \__________\ \ \ | | \ \|__________| \ jrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojro jrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojro | |jro | | | ________ | | | | |_____ | ))(( | "Oh, just 'chatting' | )))(() |______ on the computer." |((()))) ------- / |((())))\\\\) / ___ |// \\( oo\ | \\ |\\ //(\o//______|__||_________ / (/ \)\\\\/)_ __/__\/|____ /_____\ \\\/_-\//|____|/ /| | | | |~~|\/___________/ | | | | |/ || | / |_|_| |___________|/ (_) (_) @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ _____________ "You know you are not supposed to be on _ chat programs! With all those filthy | chat rooms, it isn't safe! Now, you..." ______ | _ \ \ | |fly the \_/_ ((()) 17 | | \ | | _______/__\ ))o o(( __ | | | | stea ))\o/(( | "It's okay, Mom! | | | United Stat /\~v~/\ rce| I'm practicing | |[] |___________ //(_ _)\\ __| safe chatting!" )| | \\\ /// / | \ | | (/ \) \\\\ ____ | |\ | | | /_____\ ( oo |\___\ | | \| | | | | | \o/ ||___| | \\ | | | | | | (/_\)/____\_ | \\| | jro|___________________|_|_|__ |\ ||_____|\__| \| (_) (_) | \__________\ \ \ | | \ \|__________| \ VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV "??Safe Chatting??" \ \ ? ? ((()) ? ))o o(( ))\o/(( ? /\~v~/\ ? //(_ _)\\ \\\ /// ? (/ \) /_____\ | | | | | | |_|_| jro (_) (_) 000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 __________________________________________________ ________________________ jro|\ | AIM HIGH | | \ ______ | __ | | \ | |fly the \_/_ ((()) 17 | | \ | | _______/__\ ))- -(( __ | | | | stea ))\-/(( | "Sure! See, I've | | | United Stat /\~v~/\ rce| put Dad's condoms | |[] |___________ //(_ _)\\ __| on all my fingers." )| | \\\ /// / | | (/ \) \\\\ ____ | |\ | | | /_____\ ( oo |\___\ | | \| | | | | | \o/ ||___| | \\ | | | | | | (/_\)/____\_ | \\| | |___________________|_|_|__ |\ ||_____|\__| \| (_) (_) | \__________\ \ \ | | \ \|__________| \ JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO ORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJ _________________________________________________ ________________________ jro|\ | AIM HIGH | | \ ______ | __ | | \ | |fly the \_/__\_/ F117 | | \ | | _______/__\/__\_______ | | | | stealth | | | | United States Air Force| | |\ |[] |________________________| | | \ () | | | \ | \\\\ ____ | |\ | | ( oo |\___\ | | \| | \-/ ||___| | \\ | | (/_\)/____\_ | \\| ______|__________________________ |\ ||_____|\__| | \__________\ \ \ | | \ \|__________| \ thatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsall thatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsall

__________________________ /_____________////________/| __________ |__ ))) oo ) __| __ jro / / oo ) \-/ / /| /_/ \-/ // \\ /_/ | | |__ // \\ //|_|\\____| | | | |__""/\\""""////""____| | | |_|__(_)(_)__////_______|_|/ __________ (_)(_) / /| /_________/ | | __ | | | [__] | | | _ .. | | |_________|/ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ "MOM! I want this for Christmas!" / ________ /________________ /_____________////________/| __________ |__ ))) oo ) __| __ jro / / oo ) \-/ / /| /_/ \o/ // \\ /_/ | | |__ // \\ //|_|\\____| | | | |__""/\\""""////""____| | | |_|__(_)(_)__////_______|_|/ __________ (_)(_) / /| /_________/ | | __ | | | [__] | | | _ .. | | |_________|/ ******************************************** ******************************************** __________________________ /_____________////________/| __________ |__ ))) oo ) __| __ jro / / oo ) \-/ / /| /_/ \-/ // \\ /_/ | | |__ // \\ //|_|\\____| | | | |__""/\\""""////""____| | | |_|__(_)(_)__////_______|_|/ __________ (_)(_) / /| /_________/ | | __ | | | [__] | | | _ .. | | |_________|/ 8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888 8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888 "MOM! They're showin' what else I NEED for Christmas!" / /// / (\\\) ((( _____\_/_____())))________ | | | |jro =========================================== =========================================== "MOM!!! I GOTTA HAVE THIS OTHER COOL THING THEY'RE ABBERTISIN' ON TV!!!" . \' ./ ' . ((( . ( oo ' ' / \O/ \ ' !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "MOM!!! I REALLY GOTTA HAFF ONE OF THESE THINGS!!!" ' '. . . \ \' ./ ' . ))) ' ' oo ) ' ' / \O/ .\ ' JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO __________________________ /_________________________/| __________ |__ ))) __| __ jro / / oo ) / /| /_/ \-/ /_/ | | |__ // \\ ____________| | | | |__""/\\""____________| | | |_|__(_)(_)_____________|_|/ __________ / /| /_________/ | | __ | | | [__] | | | _ .. | | |_________|/ @*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@* @*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@* ______________________________ * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * _____ ______________ | | || | | | || | | |______||______| | | || | () "Did he fall | | asleep, Tommy?" _____| | \ __________/ | \ __((())__ _____|___________|_))o o((_|__ //// | ((\o/)) | oo ) | /\~*~/\ | \-/ |//(_ _)\\| /\\ /// \ / \\\ |// /_\)_/ \_(/_\ (/\ | |_/_____\_| | \\\\ | | \ \\ \ | | (_)(_) | | / // / | | |_|_/_//_/__|_|jro \_)\_) jrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojro jrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojro ______________________________ * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * _____ ______________ | | || | | | || | | _| |"No way, Mom. I just | ()| coudn't take anymore, | so I told him you'd | gone to the store." | / __((())__ _____|_ / _______|_))o o((_|__ \\\\ | ((\-/)) | ( oo | /\~*~/\ | \o/ |//(_ _)\\| //\ /// \ / \\\ \\| /_\)_/ \_(/_\ ||| | |_/_____\_| | ||| | | \ \\ \ | | (_)_) | | / // / | | |_|_/_//_/__|_|jro \_)\_) &#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#& &#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#& ______________________________ * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * _____ ______________ | | || | | | || | | |______||______| | || | ()| "God bless | | my firstborn." __| | \ ____/ | __((())__ _____|___________|_))- -((_|__ | ((\o/)) | | /\~*~/\ | |//(_ _)\\| /// \ / \\\ /_\)_/ \_(/_\ | |_/_____\_| | | | \ \\ \ | | | | / // / | | |_|_/_//_/__|_|jro \_)\_) endendendendendendendendendendendend endendendendendendendendendendendend

_____ _____________ / ___) ) __________________ _____________ / / OO ( _________________ \_( _) ) "Daddy, today in \___-)))= . school, we learnt / \\_/ . that smoking is bad | | || \ for your helph." | | ||_/ . ~ \ | | || . %%%% . |_|_|| . . %%%oo | / \| . . _________ %%%o/ _____ / ///\ ____________________ //~\ / / /\ \ / / (/___\ / / | | / / // \\ /__/ |__| / / (_) (_) [___) [___)/ / ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) "Bad for your health? I guess that's true enough, dear." _____ / _____________ / ___) _____________________ _____________ / / OO ____________________ \_( _) . . \___o/ . . / \ . |/ / | / / |\ ( ~ . . \ \ |_\ ) %%%% |\_\ | \ ( . . . %%%oo |_/ \|//= _________ %%%-/ _____ / ///\ ____________________ //~\ / / /\ \ / / (/___\ / / | | / / // \\ /__/ |__| / / (_) (_) [___) [___)/ / = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = _____ / /)__\ /_/- \- \( _) "Yes. First your lungs __\_-_/__ turn black, and then / \ | / \ you die." / \_/ \ \ / /| o \ \ \ _________ \ _________ \ \| o |\ \ ) \ \ \__|______| \__\ ( . ~ \ %%%%% ) |/ \| ) \ ) \ %%o o%% //| || | ///= \ %%\o/%% | || | \ . \ ______ //~'~\\ ______ ) )| | _\ . . \ (/_____\) / / | | \ \ // \\ /__/ |__| \ \ (_) (_) (__) (__) \ . j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o j r o "That's what they say... Still, you shouldn't worry about it much, Sweet- heart. I figure the shock of all the new taxes they keep coming up with to put on cigarettes is going to give me a heart attack, looong before my lungs turn black." ( ___ / ) / \ / (( / \ (\_____/) __\___/__ / \ \ ___ / \ ______\ \__| |\ \ \ | |/ / \ |_____|__/ %%%%% /_ _| %%%%%%% / /| | %%%%%%% \ / / | | // \\ \ \ \ \ | | (/_____\) \ \ \__\|__| // \\ \ . \ __ (___)__) _____ (_) (_) ____\ \ \ JRO endendendendendendendendendendendendendendend endendendendendendendendendendendendendendend

______________ ||\ || || \ || || \ || || | || "Boy, is it ever cold!" || |_________| / || | / || | (((( [:] || | %%%%))))) || | %%%%%%__/ || (|)%%%%%% \\ || | // \\__// || |(/____\) | _|| | //\\ |||_____________ \ | (_)(_))(_) \ | \| \ \ "You said it, Billy. It's fr-fr-freezin'." 44444444444444444444444444444444444444444 44444444444444444444444444444444444444444 _____________________________ ______________ ||\ || || \ || || \ || || | || || |_________|| || | || || | (((( [:] || | %%%%))))) || | %%%%%%__/ || (|)%%%%%% \\ || | // \\__// || |(/____\) | _|| | //\\ |||_____________ \ | (_)(_))(_) \ | \| \ \ "How much longer, Billy?" JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO _____________________________ ______________ ||\ || "Just a minute or so more. || \ || By then, we ought to have || \ || let in enough cold so Dad || | || will HAVE to build up the || |_________| / the fire." || | / || | (((( [:] || | %%%%))))) || | %%%%%%__/ || (|)%%%%%% \\ || | // \\__// || |(/____\) | _|| | //\\ |||_____________ \ | (_)(_))(_) \ | \| endendendendendendendendendendendendendend endendendendendendendendendendendendendend

____ ___\/ / ___\ (___ \ / / oo oo \| \( _) (_ )/ \__-/ \O_/ / |\ / \ | | | | | | ______ | | | _____ | | | ______ | | | | | | | | | | | | |__| | | |_| |/ \_| |_/ \ |///| |\\\ | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |___|_ _|__| [_____) (____] "... and my wife is so cute! After she makes love, she curls up and goes to sleep, like little kitten." JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO ORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJORJ ____ ___\/ / ___\ (___ \ / / oo OO \| \( _) (_ )/ \__o/ \-_/ / |\ / \ | | | | | | ______ | | | _____ | | | ______ | | | | | | | | | | | | |__| | | |_| |/ \_| |_/ \ |///| |\\\ | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |___|_ _|__| [_____) (____] "Sounds nice... After my wife has sex, she calls home and tells me she'll be back in time for dinner." finifinifinifinifinifinifinifinifini inifinifinifinifinifinifinifinifinif

__ /__\ __ /( oo|==| \_o/|__|) / \/ \// \\ |\/ \\_| |\)| |||| |||| (_)(_) ............................................................ __________ "Well, well, Mrs Jones. You _________________ definately ARE pregnant. |\ Looks like your date of | \ of conception was on the | \ 8th... What were you doing | ___________ at the time?" _______ | | | / |License| | | Dr JRO | / ((()) | ~~*~~ | | | | ___ ))o o(( |_______| | | | /___\ __ ((\-/)) | | |//( oo|==| / ~v~ \ | |O | \__o/|__|) //(_ _)\\ | | |/ \/\/ / \\\ /// _______ | | / / / (// \\) |__o__| | | \ \ \/ _____/_____\_______ |__o__| | | |\/)__| |=====/ // /========| |__o__| | _|_________|| | ||____| || |_______||___|__o__|____| | || | || |_||_| || \ | || | || (_/ \_) || \ |_||_| \ (__)(__) \ jrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojro jrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojro _________________________________________________________ |\ "Probably the | \ missionary postition." | \ / | ___________ / _______ | | | |License| | | Dr JRO | ((()) | ~~*~~ | | | | ___ ))o o(( |_______| | | | /___\ __ ((\o/)) | | |//( OO|==| / ~v~ \ | |O | \__-/|__|) //(_ _)\\ | | |/ \/\/ / \\\ /// _______ | | / / / (// \\) |__o__| | | \ \ \/ _____/_____\_______ |__o__| | | |\/)__| |=====/ // /========| |__o__| | _|_________|| | ||____| || |_______||___|__o__|____| | || | || |_||_| || \ | || | || (_/ \_) || \ |_||_| \ (__)(__) \ thatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsall thatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsallthatsall

_____ / \ /~~~~~\ / \ / \ (\_______/) [|_______|] ~|_____|~ _\_______/_ / \ / \ / \ / BUDWIESER \ / | | \ / | ___ | \ \ | | / \ | | | | / \ | | /\ \ | |BUD| | / |\| |/|| \/ |___| \/ |||_____|||| /___________\ ||\_ _/||| \ _ _ /| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| jro |||__|__|||| ||___|___||| ______|(__) (__)|/_________|/__| |__\|/____ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / _____ / \ _/~~~~~~| / \ (_o\__ | (\_______/) /_ ]\__| ~|_____|~ _\_______|_ / \ / \ / \ / BUDWIESER \ / | | \ / | ___ | \ \ | | / \ | | | | / \ | | /\ \ | |BUD| | / |\| |/|| \/ |___| \/ |||_____|||| /___________\ ||\_ _/||| \ _ _ /| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| jro |||__|__|||| ||___|___||| ______|(__) (__)|/_________|/__| |__\|/____ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / "Man!...I wouldn't want you thinkin' I was queer, but I gotta say it: You've got the biggest dick I've ever seen, guy. I never even heard of one that big." _____ \ / \ \ /~~~~~\ / \ / \ (\_______/) [|_______|] ~|_____|~ _\_______/_ / \ / \ / \ / BUDWIESER \ / | | \ / | ___ | \ \ | | / \ | | | | / \ | | /\ \ | |BUD| | / |\|_____|/|| \/ |___| \/ |||_ _|||| /___________\ ||| | |||| \ _ _ /| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| jro |||__|__|||| ||___|___||| ______|(__) (__)|/_________|/__| |__\|/____ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / "Thanks." / _____ / / \ /~~~~~\ / \ / \ (\_______/) [|_______|] ~|_____|~ _\_______/_ / \ / \ / \ / BUDWIESER \ / | | \ / | ___ | \ \ | | / \ | | | | / \ | | /\ \ | |BUD| | / |\|_____|/|| \/ |___| \/ |||_ _|||| /___________\ ||| | |||| \ _ _ /| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| jro |||__|__|||| ||___|___||| ______|(__) (__)|/_________|/__| |__\|/____ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / "Uhh... Just how big does that thing get when it's hard?" \ _____ \ / \ _/~~~~~~| / \ (_o\__ | (\_______/) /_ ]\__| ~|_____|~ _\_______|_ / \ / \ / \ / BUDWIESER \ / | | \ / | ___ | \ \ | | / \ | | | | / \ | | /\ \ | |BUD| | / |\|_____|/|| \/ |___| \/ |||_ _|||| /___________\ ||| | |||| \ _ _ /| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| jro |||__|__|||| ||___|___||| ______|(__) (__)|/_________|/__| |__\|/____ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / "I wouldn't know." / _____ / "?" / \ /~~~~~\ / / \ / \ (\_______/) [|_______|] ~|_____|~ _\_______/_ / \ / \ / \ / BUDWIESER \ / | | \ / | ___ | \ \ | | / \ | | | | / \ | | /\ \ | |BUD| | / |\|_____|/|| \/ |___| \/ |||_ _|||| /___________\ ||| | |||| \ _ _ /| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| jro |||__|__|||| ||___|___||| ______|(__) (__)|/_________|/__| |__\|/____ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / "Just what do you mean by that?!!" _____ \ / \ \ /~~~~~\ / \ / \ (\_______/) [|_______|] ~|_____|~ _\_______/_ / \ / \ / \ / BUDWIESER \ / | | \ / | ___ | \ \ | | / \ | | | | / \ | | /\ \ | |BUD| | / |\|_____|/|| \/ |___| \/ |||_ _|||| /___________\ ||| | |||| \ _ _ /| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| jro |||__|__|||| ||___|___||| ______|(__) (__)|/_________|/__| |__\|/____ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / "Well, every time I start to get an errection, I pass out, cold." / _____ / ` ' ' / \ `_/~~~~~~| ` / \ (_X\__ | (\_______/) /_ ]\__| ~|_____|~ _\_______|_ / \ / \ / \ / BUDWIESER \ / | | \ / | ___ | \ \ | | / \ | | | | / \ | | /\ \ | |BUD| | / |\|_____|/|| \/ |___| \/ |||_ _|||| /___________\ ||| | |||| \ _ _ /| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| ||| | |||| || | ||| jro |||__|__|||| ||___|___||| ______|(__) (__)|/_________|/__| |__\|/____ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

_______ / _____) \ ( - -\ \_\ ^/ /\\~/\______ _____/ \_____(~\ !!WAHH!! ~~~~/ /( )~~~~/// ' \/ ' --* \ \ \ /--*---| ` )))) \ \/ \ | `(-- )' _____/~/_____\_____| /\O/ ' ________\ \ \____| \\ \\ / / / |___\__\\ =======/__/__/=====| //\\) jro \___)__) || (_)(_) \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\/// @ @ \ \|/ /|\ \|/ /|\ \ @ @ \ ////////////////////\\\\\ WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM __________________________ "What's the _______ matter, dear?" / _____) / \ ( o o\ / \_\ ^/ /\\~/\______ _____/ \_____(~\ ~~~~/ /( )~~~~/// --* \ \ \ /--(((-| \ \/ \ ())))| _____/~/_____\_\_/ \ ________\ \ // \\ \ / / \\_// "..Sniff..Sniff.. =======/__/__/=//\\ It was Sissy!" jro \___)__(_)(_) \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\/// @ @ \ \|/ /|\ \|/ /|\ \ @ @ \ ////////////////////\\\\\ JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO JROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJROJRO __________________________ _______ / _____) \ ( O O\ \_\ ^/ /\\~/\______ _____/ \_____(~\ ~~~~/ /( )~~~~/// "She's heppin' me --* \ \ \ /--(((-| / get dressed, and \ \/ \ ()))) / then comb my hair. _____/~/_____\_\_/ ..sniff.. An' she ________\ \ // \\ say I got cowlick! / / \\_// An' I haven't been =======/__/__/=//\\ even near no cows!" jro \___)__(_)(_) \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\/// @ @ \ \|/ /|\ \|/ /|\ \ @ @ \ ////////////////////\\\\\ finisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinis sinifsinifsinifsinifsinifsinifsinifsinif

_____________________ | | | | | | | | | "Fellow Martians, a matter of | the GRAVEST CONCERN has just | been discovered. Our Terran | Research Survey Scouts have | learned that the Earth is..." |____________ / ______| \__/ (oo) (\ ________ //~~\\// _______________jro \\__/\/ |||| |||| (_)(_) 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 _____________________ | | | | | | | | "...about to be INVADED and | it's inhabitants ATTACKED by | a previously unknown, possibly | extra-solar species..." | \ |_____________________| \ \__/ (oo) _____________________ //~~\\ _________ \\__// //|| \\|| jro (_)(_) % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % % _____________________ | | | | | | | "These aliens seem to be capable | of materializing out of thin air, | perhaps from some extra-galactic | base. They then attack the Earth | Terro-Proto-Beings with projectile | launchers, before their victims |_ have an opportunity to defend themselves." / \__/ (\ (oo) ____________ \\//~~\\ ________________ \/\__// ||\\ ||// (_)(_) jro * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * _____________________ | | | | | | | | "We must decide whether to | intervene and save the Earth | carbo-sub-creatures, before | they are RENDERED EXTINCT!." | \ |_____________________| \ \__/ (oo) jro__________________ //~~\\ _________ \\__// |||| |||| (_)(_) jrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojro jrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojrojro _____________________ | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | "Engage the | | viewscreen." |_____________________| / \__/ (__) _____________________ //()\\ ______jro \\__// |||| |||| (_)(_) # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # _____________________ | /)) | | /\ %%% / )) | "Here you see the | / \ )- %/ )) | invader itself, | <----{{{ \_ / )) | along with its | \ / /||\__)) | weapon, which is | \/ \||| | usually launched | (/ )) | at the posterior | | || | musculo-area of | o__)_) | the helpless proto- |_____________________| Earth-creatures..." / (\ \__/ \\(__) jro_________________ \\()\\ ____________ \__// |||| |||| (_)(_) finisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinis finisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinisfinis

_ _ _ _ | \ | | __ _ (_)___| |_ __ _ _ __ ___ _____ _ | \| |/ _` || / __| __/ _` | '__/ __|_ / | | | | |\ | (_| || \__ \ || (_| | | \__ \/ /| |_| | |_| \_|\__,_|/ |___/\__\__,_|_| |___/___|\__, | |__/ _ _ _ |___/ ______ ___ ___// __| | _//__ _(_) __ _| |_ __ _ |_ / _` \ \ /\ / / _ \ / _` | / __\ \ /\ / / |/ _` | __/ _` | / / (_| |\ V V / (_) | (_| | \__ \\ V V /| | (_| | || (_| | /___\__,_| \_/\_/ \___/ \__,_| |___/ \_/\_/ |_|\__,_|\__\__,_| .-------------------------------------------------------. |Chirurg jest najstarszym zawodem ! Ewa zostala zrobiona| |z zebra Adama, a to mi wyglada na robote chirurga. | '-----. ,----.------------------------------------------' ,,,,|/ |Masz pewnie racje, ale wczesniej z chaosu| W c__oo' W |zostaly stworzone niebo i ziemia. Mogl to| || \__/ || |zaplanowc tylko jakis architekt. ___ | ||____=____|| .---------------------------.---. ,-/___\--' '---. .---' |No tak, ale wczesniej ktos | \| oo "| | | |musial stworzyc chaos. I to| \ U._/ | | \\\\|musial byc jakis polityk ! | __=__ | | c oo' ,------------------------' /____.\___ | | | ,U_/ /()____\\__) |___| __=__ // |___|// _|||_ / \^/ \ /\" ( )" '--'-- || V || / | ||| \| | || /'.| ||| |_|_|"-. / | _|||_ ||| | ' | '--'--' |||---' _|||_ '--'--' pn

.-------------------------------------. |Dlaczego nie bylo Cie rano w biurze ?| | .------------------------------,----'-------. | '-----------------------. |Bylem chory.| |Nie wygladales na chorego| '----------. | |wczoraj na wyscigach.----'-----------------' | '------------,-------|Trzeba bylo mnie widziec| | |po szostej gonitwie... | | '----------------,-------' \\\\ / ___ / c oo / .. ,) / | ,U U. | __=__ __=__ / \^/ \ / \^/ \ || V || || V || \| | || || | || |_|_|"-. .-"|_|_|| ||| | | ||| " |||---' '---||| _|||_ --------- _|||_ ___ pn '--'--' --------------- '--'--' ---

.--------------------------------------------. |To skandal ! Jak Pan moze, Panie Naczelniku,| |zmuszac mego meza do tak ciezkiej paracy ?! | '--,-------------------------------.-------. | |Ciezkiej?! Wiezniowie wyklejaja | | | | pudelka kartonowe | | | '--------------,--,-------------'-------' , / | Tak ?! A w nocy musza| +--+--+--+ / | kopac jakis tunel ! | %%% | | | | / '-------------------.--'%%%%% | | | | \\\\ / \ '' %% +--+--+--+ c oo \ Uo &' | .U \, __=__ __=__ "\ / | | \*/ | // \\/( (_|| ||_|_|| //| )/|_/ ------------------ / [_] |______________| / \ | I| ||| | /_______\ | I| |||_ | _||| | ^ '--'' | ''--' pn

.-------------------------------------------------------------. | Patrz ! Tamten jacht nalezy do czlonka zarzadu Merrill | | Lyncha, ta lodz motorowa jest wlasnoscia glownego w Goldman | | Sachs. A ten piekny zaglowiec jest duma szefa handlowego | | Prudential-Bache... ,-----. ,-----------------------------' .-----------------------. | / ( Ciekawe dlaczego nie ma( / _/ )tu jachtow zadnego z ich) /_/ ( klientow .-----------' // '----------' // o / \\\\ o ,,,, / c--00 c .. / /\ | -U | ,U / | __=__ __=______ / | / \^/ \ / \^/ ____|P / |\ || V || || V | / | \ \| | || || | | /______| \ |_|_|"-. .-"|_|_| --------- <| .__'.__,||--' ||| | | ||| -| ~~~~~ ~~~~~ \ / |||---' '---||| -- | ~~ ~ ~''" ~""'' ~ _|||_ --- _|||_ -- | ~ ~ '--'--' -- '--'--' -- | ~ ~~~ -- ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~ -- ~~~ ~~ ~~ ~~~~~~~~ ~~~~ ~~ ~ ~~ pn

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ | |_ | || || || | | || || || || || || || || ' \ |_||_||_||_| \_,_| \_,_| \_,_| \_,_||_||_| (_)(_)(_)(_) \ | ,----\ |-, ,---------, ||',__\ |___', ,'________,'|| |||| \| | | |||| |||| /\ | | /\ |||| |||| \/ | | \/ |||| |||| | | |||| |||| =l | | l= |||| |||| | | |||| |||| | | |||| ',|| | | ||,' '---------' +---------' _ _ _ _ __ _ __ _ __ _ __ _ | |_ | |_ | || | / _` |/ _` |/ _` |/ _` || ' \ | ' \ |_||_| \__,_|\__,_|\__,_|\__,_||_||_||_||_|(_)(_) | / ,---------, ,-| /-----, ||',________', ,'___|/___,'|| |||| | | | |||| |||| /\ | | /\ |||| |||| \/ | | \/ |||| |||| | | |||| |||| =l | | l= |||| |||| | | |||| |||| | | |||| ',|| | | ||,' '---------' +---------' _ _ _ _ _ ___ ___ ___ __ | |_ | || || || | / _ \/ _ \/ _ \/ _|| ' \ |_||_||_||_| \___/\___/\___/\__||_||_|(_)(_)(_)(_) \ | \ | ,----\ |-, ,---------, ||',__\ |___', ,'________,'|| |||| \| | | |||| |||| /\ | | /\ |||| |||| \/ | | \/ |||| |||| | | |||| |||| =l | | l= |||| |||| | | |||| |||| | | |||| ',|| | | ||,' '---------' +---------' _ _ _ _ _ _ ___ ___ ___ ___ __ | |_ | |_ | |_ | || || | / -_)/ -_)/ -_)/ -_)/ _|| ' \ | ' \ | ' \ |_||_||_| \___|\___|\___|\___|\__||_||_||_||_||_||_|(_)(_)(_) ,---------, ,-| /-----, ||',________', ,'___|/___,'|| |||| | | | |||| |||| /\ | | /\ |||| |||| \/ | | \/ |||| |||| | | |||| |||| =l | | l= |||| |||| | | |||| |||| | | |||| ',|| | | ||,' '---------' +---------' ____ __ __ __ __ ___ __ / __ \ / / / / / // |/ / / / / /_/ // / / / / // /|_/ / / / / ____// /___/ /_/ // / / / /_/ /_/ /_____/\____//_/ /_/ (_) \ | \ | ,----\ |-, ,---------, ||',__\ |___', ,'________,'|| |||| \| | | |||| |||| /\ | | /\ |||| |||| \/ | | \/ |||| |||| | | |||| |||| =l | | l= |||| |||| | | |||| |||| | | |||| ',|| | | ||,' '---------' +---------' Gratuluje ! | / ,---------, ,-| /-----, ||',________', ,'___|/___,'|| |||| | | | |||| |||| /\ | | /\ |||| |||| \/ | | \/ |||| |||| | | |||| |||| =l | | l= |||| |||| | | |||| |||| | | |||| ',|| | | ||,' '---------' +---------' Nie ma czego :-( Okulary :-( \ | \ | ,----\ |-, ,---------, ||',__\ |___', ,'________,'|| |||| \| | | |||| |||| /\ | | /\ |||| |||| \/ | | \/ |||| |||| | | |||| |||| =l | | l= |||| |||| | | |||| |||| | | |||| ',|| | | ||,' '---------' +---------' pn

Ryszardzie, musimy porozmawiać. --| --------- | -------- | ----- %%% \\\ | Zdecydowanie ! | %%%%% .. | | Mam na imię Roman. | %%c '' U. ' | | %! .U __=__ | | __=__ | \ | | / \ |. \\ | | // _) _). ||\ \\ --- | \\ || \\ ------------ ----- | \\------------- ------ | ---- ----- | --- ---| -- --- ------- | | ---- ---- ------ | ---- --- ------- ----- ---- -|-- --------- | ---- | -------- ---- ----- --| | pn

Dlaczego zamężna kobieta jest cięższa od kobiety wolnej ? \\\\ c .. | .U __=__ |. .| || || || || | === | " ||| " ||| |||_ '--'' Kobieta wolna wraca do domu, patrzy co ma w lodówce i idzie do łóżka ... \\\\ c .. | .U __=__ ,/ |. .\ /" || |\// || | | === " ||| ||| |||_ '--'' Kobieta zamężna wraca do domu, patrzy co ma w łóżku i idzie do lodówki ... \\\\ c .. | .U __=__ ,/ |. .\ /" || |\// || | | === " ||| ||| |||_ '--'' pn

| ____ | | __ _ _ __ ( __ | | .----------------------.' | | `_ \ / _ | | | A Panowie to co robią|| | | |_) | | (_| | | | zawodowo ? .---------'|_| |_,__/ \____| | '--------. / '-------------------------' \\\\ \/ c .. __ //// _\\/ | ,U .. ) .. , .. \\ __=__ U- | U- | U- / / \^/ \ ___ _=__ _=_ ___ _=_ || V || |||/_|||/__.\ |||/__.\ __\|_|_||_______||E|_||E|___|_||E|___| \_______________________________\.-___) | | \\__) | | \\| | | //= | | || |------------------------------| __||__ | ____ | | __ _ _ __ ( __ | | .----------------------------------------------. |Każdy z nas ma taki mały interes remontowo- | |budowlany. Stasiek w Chicago, Jaś w San Diego,| '----------. a ja w New Yorku. .---------------' \\\\ '-------. ,------' c .. __ //// \ | _\\/ | .U .. ) .. , \| .. \\ __=__ U- | U- | U. / / \^/ \ ___ _=__ _=_ ___ _=_ || V || |||/_|||/__.\ |||/__.\ __\|_|_||_______||E|_||E|___|_||E|___| \_______________________________\.-___) | | \\__) | | \\| | | //= | | || |------------------------------| __||__ | ____ | | __ _ _ __ ( __ | | .----------------------------. \ / _ | | |Och ! Jak dobrze się składa,| | | (_| | | | mam ogrodzenie do remontu. | / \____| | | Zechcą Panowie spojrzeć ?! | ------------' '--\\\\--. ,-----------------' c .. |/ __ //// _\\/ | .U ' .. ) .. , .. \\ __=__ U- | U- | U- / / \^/ \ _= _=_ _=_ //| V || |||/_|||/__.\ |||/__.\ //_|_|_||_______||E|_||E|___|_||E|___| \_______________________________\.-___) | | \\__) | | \\| | | //= | | || |------------------------------| __||__ .----------------------------------------------------------------. |Z moich pomiarów wynika, że remont wyniesie 900$ : 400$ materiał| |400$ dla mojej ekipy i 100$ zarobku dla mnie za projekt. | '---------------------. ,---------------------------------------' \ | \\\\ +++ _ \ __ +++ c .. | |------[_}\ .. ) ------| |----------------------- | -U | | \\ \U. | ---| | --- __=__ | | \\_\_=__ ----| | ------ / \^/ \ | | \_ \ -- | | ------- || V || | | | || | | ------- \| | || | | -- '---|/ | | ------- |_|_|" | | ----- | ))\ | | ------- ||| | | ------- |||| \ | | ------- ||| | |------ |||| \ | |------ _|||_ | |--------- _|||| --\--| |----------------------- '--'--' '-" '--'-' ' ""' .----------------------------------------------------------------. |Mój kosztorys jest taki: za remont 700$. Ekipa dostanie 300$, bo| |będę im pomagał, 300$ na tańsze materiały, 100$ dla mnie. | '---------------------. ,---------------------------------------' \ | \\\\ +++ _ \//// +++ c .. | |------[_}\ .. , ------| |----------------------- | -U | | \\ \U. | ---| | --- __=__ | | \\_\_=__ ----| | ------ / \^/ \ | | \_ \ -- | | ------- || V || | | | || | | ------- \| | || | | -- '---|/ | | ------- |_|_|" | | ----- | ))\ | | ------- ||| | | ------- |||| \ | | ------- ||| | |------ |||| \ | |------ _|||_ | |--------- _|||| --\--| |----------------------- '--'--' '-" '--'-' ' ""' | ____ | | __ _ _ __ ( __ | | | |__' | | '_ \ / _ | | | | | | | ) | | (_| | | .-----------. | .-----------------._| | | A Pan ??! | '--| Proponuję 1700$ |----' '------. ,-' '-------. ,------' |/ \ | _\\/ \\\\ ' \| .. \\ c .. U. / | .U ___ ___ ___ _=_ __=__ ||| ||| |||/__.\ _ / \^/ \_______|||__|||______||E|___| \__|| V ||______________________\.-___) | \| | || | \\__) | |_|_|" | \\| | ||| | //= | ||| | || |- _|||_ ----------------------| __||__ '--'--' | ____ | | __ _ _ __ ( __ | | .---------------._ | |__' | | '_ \ / _ | | | Jak to ?! Pan '. .--------------------------------------. |nawet nie widział | | Po co ? 500$ dla mnie, 500$ dla Pana | '-. ogrodzenia !! .'-\ i wynajmiemy Jaśka z San Diego. | '------. ,--' '-------. ,-------------------------' | / \ | _\\/ \\\\ |/ \| .. \\ c oo ' U. / | ,U ___ ___ ___ _=_ __=__ ||| ||| |||/__.\ _ / \^/ \_______|||__|||______||E|___| \__|| V ||______________________\.-___) | \| | || | \\__) | |_|_|" | \\| | ||| | //= | ||| | || |- _|||_ ----------------------| __||__ '--'--' pn

Meet the crew of the Starship ASCIIprise: _\||/_ //..\\ .( ^). Trollboy, Captain of the ASCIIprise. __ bb {..} Science officer Spock. .|^. OO dd .|^. Chief engineer Nerdboy. bb ..~ ___ Communications officer Mandura. .<<. ()..) /| .||. Chief of security, Hammerhead guy. __ || (..) __ Nonspecific random guy #1. .|^. (--) dd .Y^. Nonspecific random guy #2 bb ,,, -- Ensign W4R3Z D00D. ,//. _/ )_ \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // -- ()..) \\ o| \// .=========================. \\/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ \\ o| .\// |_\|/_|| __\\/, |()//..~ OO //..\\|| Nerdboy, (F'}\\:.| .\// <<' .|^. /-( ^).// go swab the ||- \\/ |.:// //"| bb '| dd |'/ torpedo tubes! bb \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ \\/ // (/'} (,,) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ / \ /dew \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // -- ()'') \\ o| \// .=========================. \\/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ \\ o| .\// |_\|/_|| __\\/, |()//..~ OO //..\\|| What's the {'7)\\:.| .\// <<' .|^. /-( ^).// matter, are .|| \\/ |.:// //"| bb '| dd |'/ we out of dd \\ | \// __ |____|/ __ toilet \\/ // (..) {'n) paper? \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ / \ /dew \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // ~~ (..() \\ o| \// .=========================. \\/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ \\ o| .\// |_\|/_|| __\\/, |()//..~ OO //..\\|| Let's go blow (F')\\:.| .\// <<' .|^. /-( ^).// stuff up! ||- \\/ |.:// //"| bb '| dd |'/ bb \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ \\/ // (**) (--) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ / \ /azc Sir, a ship \// ,,, ___ \\/ has just | // ~~ (..() \\ o| decloaked \// .=========================. \\/ off the| // / ) \ ______ || \ \\ o| port .\// |_\|/_|| __\\/, bow! |()//..~ OO //..\\|| Shields up! (F')\\:.| .\// <<' .|^. /-( ^).// Red Alert! ||- \\/ |.:// //"| bb '| dd |'/ bb \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ \\/ // (..) (..) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ / \ /azc .---------------------------. |/=========================\| | ..=.. | , So, Cptn. Trollboy, we meet again. | \\=// //-=-\\ | | //o=o\\ __\-/__ | | _\~/_ / \nU \ | | / \nU\ | /\ | | '---------------------------'dew \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // ~~ (..() \\ o| \// .=========================..|^. \\/ | // / ) \ ______ \|| \\ o| .\// * |_\|/_|| __\\/, |()/~.. *O* //..\\|| Too late, they{'7)\\:.| .\// >> *.*^.* /-( ^).// have beamed || \\/ |.:// |"\\ b* '| dd |'/ Engineer dd \\\ | \// * * __ |____|/ __ Nerdboy! \\/ // ('') ('n) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ / \ /azc .---------------------------. |/=========================\| | ..=.. | , You will lower your shields and | \\=// //-=-\\ | surrender immediately. | //o=o\\ __\-/__ | Or we shall incinerate you. | _\~/_ / \nU \ | | / \nU\ | /\ | | '---------------------------'dew .---------------------------. |/=========================\| | ..=.. Help! | , I believe -this- belogs to you?!? | \\=// //-=-\\ | | //o=o\\ __\-/__ OO | | _\~/_ / \nU \/||' | | / \nU\ | /\ / bb | '---------------------------'dew \// ,,, ___ \\/ Sir, they | // ~~ (..() \\ o| are heavily \// .=========================..|^. \\/ armed, and | // / ) \ ______ \|| \\ o| their weapons .\// |_\|/_|| __\\/, are charged. |()//..~ ///..\|| {'7)\\:.| .\// << /-( ^).// || \\/ |.:// //"| '| dd |'/ dd \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ \\/ // (%') (n') \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ / \ /azc \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // ~~ (..() \\ o| \// .=========================. \\/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ \\ o| .\// |_\|/_|| __\\/, |()/~.. aye /..\\ || Mandura, see (F'}\\:.| .\// >> cap'n. /-( ^).// if you can hail |- \\/ |.:// |"\\ '| dd |'/ the asciifleet. bb \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ \\/ // (..) ('n) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ / \ /azc \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // ~~ (..() \\ o| \// .=========================. \\/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ \\ o| .\// |_\|/_|| __\\/, |()/..~ incoming trans /..\\ || on screen! (F'}\\:.| .\//<< mission from /-( ^).// |- \\/ |.:////"| admiral palmer '| dd |'/ bb \\\ | \// sir. __ |____|/ __ \\/ // (..) ('n) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ / \ /azc .---------------------------. |/=========================\| | /~~~~~\ | , Cptn. Trollboy, we have reports | ({. .}) | of nomUlans in your area! Be | (\ L /) | CAREFUL!!! | .___\"""/___. | And -NO- trading starbases for | / ( O ) \ | food this time! '---------------------------' dew .---------------------------. |/=========================\| | ..=.. | , You have ran for far too long, Captain. | //-=-\\ | Now you shall PAY. | \\=// __\c/__ | | //o=o\\ / \nU \ | | _\~/_ | /\ | | '---------------------------' dew .---------------------------. |/=========================\| | /~~~~~\ | , Hello? Is this thing on? | ({o o}) | | (\ L /) | | .___\"""/___. | | / ( O ) \ | '---------------------------' dew \// ,,, ___ __ \\/ | // ~~ (,,() {'7) \\ o| \// .=========================. \\/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ \\ o| .\// |_\|/_|| \\/, |()//..~ //..\\|| Yes sir, sorry sir.\:.| .\// << /.( ^).// we have a situation.\\/ |.:// //"| '| dd |'/ the nomUlans have taken\ | \// __ |____|/ __ engineer nerdboy! \\/ // (..) (..) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ /azc __.__ ___ ,Disrupters on, Captain! (_____) -==A===- __,.-'nU/\ \\___// (,-==-"//`\\ \___) _(/ _\) __.__ ___ ,Err... charged! (_____) -==A===- __,.-'nU/\ \\___// (,-==-"//`\\ \___) _(/ _\) dew .---------------------------. |/=========================\| | /~~~~~\ | , The solution is simple Captain, simply | ({- -}) | insult their Captain's mother. | (\ L /) | Research shows they simply can't handle | .___\"""/___. | it. | / ( C ) \ | '---------------------------' dew \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // ~~ (,,() \\ o| \// .=========================. \\/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ (F.} o| .\// |_\|/_|| ||-\/, |()/~.. Sir im having //..\\|| admiral, i'll bb \\:.| .\// >> trouble keeping.( ^).// call you back! \\/ |.:// //"| both transmissionsd |'/ \\\ | \// active at once. __ |____|/ __ \\/ // (..) (..) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ /azc \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // ~~ (,,() \\ o| \// .=========================. \\/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ (F.} o| .\// |_\|/_|| ||-\/, |()/..~ //..\\|| SHIELDS UP! bb \\:.| .\//<< /.( ^).// BRACE FOR IMPACT! \\/ |.:////"| `| db |'/ \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ \\/ // (..) (..) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ /azc .---------------------------. |/=========================\| | ---------~~~~~\ ----- | , Captain?!? Did you hear me?!! | ({o --------- | Captain Trollboy!!! | ======== L /) ==== | | ._--------__. -- | |------- ( O ) ======= | '---------------------------' dew __.__ ___ ,FIRE AT WILLLLL!!! (_____) -==A===- __,.-'nU/\ - uh, which one's Will? \\___// (,-==-"//`\\ \___) _(/ _\) 'JUST SHOOT SOMETHING! __.__ ___ (_____) -==A===- __,.-'nU/\ - uh, aye \\___// (,-==-"//`\\ \___)//_____ _________ _(/ _\) dew \\ __.__ ". ___ (_____) -==A===-) __,.-'nU/\ \\___// ._ (,-==-"//`\\ \___) .* _(/ _\) . -'/ \ Fwoomph! azc BOOOOOOMMM! \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // ~~ (,,() \\ o|Shields are holding, \// .=========================. \\/ , Captain. | // / ) \ ______ || \ (F.} o| .\// |_\|/_|| ||-\/, |()/..~ sir, the numulans/..\\|| We have to get bb \\:.| .\//<< are demanding /.( ^).// engineer nerdboy \\/ |.:////"| you respond `| db |'/ back before we open \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ fire! \\/ // ('') ('n) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ /azc \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // ~~ (,,() \\ o| No sir, their shields are \// .=========================. \\/ , of an unknown phase harmonic, | // / ) \ ______ || \ (F.} o| the transporters are useless. .\// |_\|/_|| ||-\/, |()/~.. Casualties reported..\|| Spock, can you bb \\:.| .\//>> on decks 5 through ^).// get a transport beam\\/ |.:////"| 12, sir. `| db |'/ through their sheilds?\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ \\/ // ('') ('n) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ /azc .---------------------------. |/=========================\| | ..=.. Ack! | , How did you like that small taste | //-=-\\ ' | of our superior firepower, Captain? | =\\\\ __\o/__ .OO | Surrender or Nerdbrat gets it. | \o\\\\ / \nU \/||` | | _~ /_ | /\ / dd | '---------------------------' dew Yes Sir! \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // -- ()..) \\ o| \// .=========================. \\/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ (F.} o| .\// | || ||-\/, |()/..~ | || \||/_ bb \\:.| .\//<< // _ /// /..\\ \\/ |.:////"| `|\__/|'/ .( ^). \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ dd \\/ // (..) (--) Officer hammerhead\| \ .----. .----. assemble a team. / azc \ /______\ /______\ make sure to / include lots of people in red uniforms that we won't miss too much if they are killed. .---------------------------. |/=========================\| | ..=.. | , Hey, get back here!!! I was threatening | //o=o\\ | you!!! | \\=// __\c/__ | | //o=o\\ / \nU \ | | _\~/_ | /\ | | '---------------------------' dew \// ,,, \\/ | // -- \\ o| \// .=========================. \\/ | // / ) \ ______ \ (F.} o| .\// | || ||-\/, |()/..~ | || _\||/ bb \\:.| .\//<< // _ /// ..\\ \\/ |.:////"| `|\__/|'/ -( ^). \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ dd \\/ // Aye sir, but it (%') (..) Mandura, buy us \| \ won't fool them .----. .----. some time with / \ for long! /______\ /______\ static! /azc .---------------------------. |/=========================\| | ..=.. | , Enough is enough. | //-=-\\ | Prepare to die, Captain. | =\\\\ __\c/__ | | \o\\\\ / \nU \ | | _~ /_ | /\ \ | '---------------------------' dew __.__ _ \ / ___ (_____){ -==A}==- __,.-'nU/\ \\_{_/{`_} -- (,-==-"//`\\ {=\--})_} .\. . . _(/ _\) dew "End simulation!" __ , Well cptn, you failed --) the Mobiashi Karu test. \// ,,, ___ <(Y^)>\\/ | // ~~ (,,() || \\ o| \// .=========================. __/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ {'7) o| .\// |_\|/_|| .||\\/, |()/..~ //..\ || dd \\:.| .\//<< /.( ^).// \\/ |.:////"| `| bb |'/ \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ \\/ // ('') ('n) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ /dew and you, ensign W4R3Z D00D, slept through the whole thing! , __ --) \// ,,,<(Y^)> ___ \\/ | // -- || (,,() \\ o| \// .=========================. __/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ {'7) o| .\// |_\|/_|| .||\\/, |()/..~ //..\ || dd \\:.| .\//<< /.( ^).// \\/ |.:////"| `| bb |'/ \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ \\/ // (/') (..) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ /azc \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // ~~ (''() \\ o| \// .=========================. __/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ {'7) o| .\// _\|/_ || Well, what do you all |()~.. //..\ || __ have to say for yourselves? .\//>> /.( ^).// - ) \\/ |.://|"\\ `| bb |'/ (^>) \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ dd \\/ // ('') ('n) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ /dew \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // ~~ (''() \\ o| *blip boop beep* \// .=========================. __/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ (F.} o| .\// _\|/_ || |-\\/, |()~.. Spock! Beam //..\ || * *__* * dd \\:.| .\//>> him into space!/.( ^).// * * * Aaahh! \\/ |.://|"\\ `| bb |'/ * *(*>)* \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __* d* * \\/ // ('') ('n) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ /azc \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // -- (,,() \\ o| \// .=========================. __/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ {F'} o| .\// _\||/_|| You, random ||.\/, |()/..~ //..\\|| guy, take us bb \\:.| .\//<< /,( ^).// out! \\/ |.:////"| `| bb |'/ \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ \\/ // (..) (,,) \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ /dew \// ,,, ___ \\/ | // -- (,,() \\ o| \// .=========================. __/ | // / ) \ ______ || \ {F'} o| .\// _\||/_|| Let's go blow ||.\/, |()/..~ //..\\|| stuff up! bb \\:.| .\//<< /,( ^).// \\/ |.:////"| `| bb |'/ Aye sir, heading \\\ | \// __ |____|/ __ 132741234 mark 0.\\/ // (..) (,,) Warp factor 5. \| \ .----. .----. / \ /______\ /______\ /azc __.__ (_____) -==A===- ----+------- ----+----- \\___// ----+------ \___) --==x====--- ----+------- dew The End!

Portret pierwszej modelki |\ _ (' o)\\\ / c\\\/\\ .' --./ || _/ .-' \\|\\ (/ \ \||/ || \\ ( - \ |||| || \\ '-' \ +-----------++---\\-----------+ .::::. ) '. || |||/\|\ || .::::::::. ' ( || | |||\|\\ || ::::::::::::. / __ / || |||\||| /\ || ::::: :::::::: _(/,__;;_ || / \ |\\ \\_ || :::: :::'.-' : || ' \ \/\) || :::: .::::. ) || . > \ .\o || .:::' .::::::::)_____.' || ):_/ . \ -c \ || .:::':: ::::: || ' ; (' '- | || ':::::. || . ; \ - ' || '::::: || _ _ . /( || '::::. || _ __ - ' || ':::::: || _ ,_ . || '::(. || _ / ')' / || ::. || _ (/ - /_ || .:: || ) _ ' ( || || :.' ( || +------++--------------++-----+ || || || || Portret drugiej modelki |||/\|\ | |||\|\\ |||\||| /\ / \ |\\ \\_ ' \ \/\) . > \ .\o || \\ ):_/ . \ -c \ || \\ ' ; (' '+------------++---\\----------+ . ; \ -|| || .::::. | _ .|| |\ _ || .::::::::. | __ - || (' o)\\\ || ::::::::::::. | ,_ || / c\\\/\\ || ::::: ::::::::_ / ')' /|| .' --./ || || :::: :::'.-_ (/ - /_|| _/ .-' \\|\\ || :::: .::::) _ ' ( || (/ \ \||/ || .:::' .::::::::.' ( || ( - \ |||| || .:::':: ::::: || '-' \ \ \|| || ':::::. || ) '. \| | || '::::: || ' ( > || || '::::. || . / __ / /| || ':::::: || :: _(/,__;;_.' || '::(. || .-' : || ::. || ::. ) || .:: || || +------++--------------++-----+ || || || ||

.------------------------------------------------. | Obawiam sie, ze nie mam dla Pana lekarstwa. | | Jest Pan przeziebiony. Musi Pan to przetrzymac.| '---------------. ,---,----------------------.---' \| |Alez Panie doktorze ! | ,,,, ,-- ' |Ja sie czuje okropnie | oo '| c oo '--------------------.___ U. ' | =U __=__ __=__ /. .| |. .| ____ || __|| \ \__ \\ /| PN\ ||{_|_/ .----\___|\'-----||--. |' ) |\____________________\ " ||| ||____________________| ||| || I ||| || ||| || I |||_ || _||| =| = '--'' =| ''--' = = .--------------------------------------------. |Dobrze. Prosze wrocic do domu, wziac goraca | |kapiel, potem zalozyc szlafrok i tak ubranym | |obiec swoj dom piec razy ... | '---------------. ,---,----------------------< \| |Alez Panie doktorze !!! | \\\\ ,-- ' |Dostane zapalenia pluc !| OO '| c oo '---------------------.___ U. ' ,' | ,U __=__ || __=__ /. .| ||/. .| ____ || __|| \_/| || /| PN\ ||{_|_/ .--------''------||--. |' ) |\____________________\ " ||| ||____________________| ||| || I ||| || ||| || I |||_ || _||| =| = '--'' =| ''--' = = .----------------------------------. | Na zapalenie pluc mam lekarstwo. | '---------------. ,----------------' \| \\\\ ,-- ' oo '| c oo U_ ' | -U __=__ __=__ /. .| |. .| ____ || || \ \__ \\ /| PN\ ||___|| .----\___|\'-----||--. |' '| |\____________________\ " |||" ||____________________| ||| || I ||| || ||| || I |||_ || _||| =| = '--'' =| ''--' = =

,,, \ o,o Czesc! \_-_ To ja. |X|\ |X| \ | | _| |_ ,,, ! Dzisiaj jest dla mnie o,o szczegolny dzien! ____=____ |X| Wlasnie dzisiaj po raz |X| pierwszy zobaczylem | | siebie. _| |_ ,,, A wlasciwie to po raz pierwszy o,o zobaczylem siebie w takiej _-_ wlasnie postaci. A wlasciwie /|X|\ to po raz pierwszy zobaczylem / |X| \ taka postac. | | _| |_ ,,, ? Moze to nie ja, tylko 6,6 jakas zupelnie inna _-_ postac? /|X|\ / |X| \ Ktos inny? | | _| |_ ,,, Wy to macie fajnie. oo ? -__ Jestescie tacy |X|\ skomplikowani. /|X| \ || Kazdy ma inne oczy, _|_\ usta, wlosy. ,,, oo ? -__ Raczki, nozki, brzuszki. |X|\ /|X|/ A u nas jest zupelnie /| inaczej. _|_\ ,,, Widzicie? oo ? -__ Jestem taki malutki. |X|\ /|X|/ / | \/ _\ Skladam sie z 25 ,,, elementow, oo ? -__ Nie |X|\ jestem /|X|/ dobry z jezeli nie / |__ matematyki, liczyc \/ / pustych ,,, ale ktos miejsc. oo ? madry moglby -__ obliczyc ilosc |X|\ mozliwych /|X|/ kombinacji / |__ tych znaczkow, _\ / ,,, z ktorych oo ? jestem zrobiony. -__ |X|\ /|X| \ Zobaczycie wtedy, | |__ ze w porownaniu do _| / waszego swiata u nas ,,, oo ? jest o wiele mniej -__ |X|\ miejsca /|X| \ na | | wyjatkowosc. _| _\ ,,, o,o Pewnie myslicie, _-_ |X|\ ze robie z igly kombajn? /|X| \ ze to wcale nie jest takie || przykre? _|_\ Ze nie ma sie czym martwic? ,,, Ze najwazniejsze jest, o,o jak ktos sie czuje, _-_ a nie jak wyglada? /|X|\ \|X|/ | | _| |_ ,,, Wiem, ze trudno wam to o,o\ zrozumiec. Ale zajrzyjcie do _-_/ sasiadow z alt.ascii-art. Pod /|X| koniec stycznia przyszla tam / |X| Zaba i nagle sie okazalo, ze to | | nie zadna Zaba, tylko Frogstein, _| |_ a nawet nie to, tylko "another 'stein emulator". A potem bylo coraz gorzej, bo wyszlo na jaw, ze ta Zaba byla przed Frogsteinem. A potem to nawet i to, ze Frogstein nie moze ,,, nazywac sie Frogstein, bo od 6,6 1972 jest imieniem _-_ zastrzezonym... /|X|\ / |X|/ I jakbyscie sie czuli na moim | | miejscu? Pierwszy dzien na _| |_ swiecie, a tu tak smutno. ,,, 9,9 _-_ Niby fakt, taka zaba to jest /|X|\ maciupenka, ledwie dwie-trzy / |X| \ linijki. I dlatego rozne zaby i / \ inne robale moga byc do siebie _| |_ podobne, a, co gorsza, identyczne. ,,, | o,o | Ja, jak podskocze, to mam osiem \_-_/ linijek, czyli trzy razy wiecej |X| niz zaby. Ale to nie znaczy, ze |X| sie trzy razy mniej martwie. | | | | / \ !! ,,, O,O No, bo co bedzie, jezeli ktoregos _o_ pieknego dnia okaze sie, ze ja to \/|X|\/ nie ja, tylko ktos inny, ktory byl |X| tu (albo gdzies indziej) na dlugo / \ przede mna i ten ktos inny przyjdzie _| |_ i kaze mi sobie stad pojsc? ,,, -,- _-_ ||X|| I nawet nie bede mogl sie bronic... ||X|| | | _| |_ ,,, C o. _- ,,, |/| C o. (\| _- ,,, | /X| C o. |_ /(X|\ _- |\ /X| ,,, /_ \/ /(X|\ C o. / \ _- ,,, /_ \/ /X| C o. /(X|\ _- / \ |\| ,,, /_ |_ (X\ C o. \ _- /_ /\ / (__/ /_ ,,, C o. _- /\/ (_/\_ ,,, C -. _- /\/ (_/\_ ,,, Jak myslicie, wygladam jak ktos inny? C o. Widzieliscie juz kiedys kogos takiego, _- jak ja? Albo bardzo, bardzo podobnego? /\/ (_/\_ ,,, Jezeli ktos taki jest, to nie mowcie C 6. mu, jak go spotkacie, ze tu bylem. _- /\/ (_/\_ ,,, A teraz spijcie dobrze, C 66 _- i niech kazdemu z was /\/ przysni sie cos innego. (_/\_ ,,, C o. _- /\/ (_/\_ ,,, C -. _- /\/ m76 (_/\_ ------------------------ część 2 ----------------------- ,,, Bim Bam Bom! C -. _- /\/ (_/\_ Bim Bam Bom! ,,, Masz nowa poczte! C -. _- /\/ (_/\_ ,,, Ojej! Naprawde?! C o. _- /\/ (_/\_ ,,, Zobaczcie, o,o __ dostalem prawdziwy list! _-_[><] /|X|\/ Jeszcze nigdy nie dostalem \|X| zadnego listu. | | _| |_ Ten jest pierwszy. ,,, Ciekawe, co bedzie w srodku? o,o _-_ Pewnie rachunek. ||/""\ \[><] Albo zdrapka. | | _| |_ ,,, Nie, to list od kogos! o,o _-__ Nie moge juz sie ||X|_\ doczekac... \|__| | | _| |_ Bardzo lubie dostawac listy. ,,, Chyba. o,o _-__ Bo jeszcze nigdy ||\__\ nie dostalem listu. \|__| | | _| |_ Ciekawe, od kogo? ,,, Jeszcze nikogo tu nie znam. o,o _-__ |||__| To moze byc od tego kogos \|__|, takiego jak ja. | | _| |_ Na pewno juz mnie znalazl. I teraz bedzie sie mscil i ,,, znecal nade mna. o,o _-__ ||| | Albo komus sie nie podobam \|__|, i wyslal list z pogrozkami. /__/ _| |_ A moze to od jakiegos admina? ,,, o,o Tyle sie o nich teraz _-__ slyszy roznych rzeczy... ||| | \| / ||__| Nie, do wojska mnie nie wezma, _| |_ za maly jestem. ,,, o,o Tak, to na pewno jest od pana |\-__ Spama. Juz sie dowiedzial, ze \ | | jestem taki maciupki i teraz | | / przysle tyle listow, ze znikne \|__| pod nimi. _| |_ ,,, Moze lepiej nie otwierac? o,o __-__ \ | | Ale to w koncu moj pierwszy list. | | / Tez byscie byli ciekawi. |__|__| _| |_ Jednak przeczytam. ,,, o,o __-__ /| Najwyzej potem szybko uciekne. \ | / | | | |_____|/ A potem udam, ze zadnego listu _| |_ nie dostalem. ,,, o,o Tylko mnie nie zdradzcie! ___-____ \ / | | |________| Hmmm... _| |_ Dziwne. ,,, 6,6 "...Message-ID:<36d0b2cc.11980659@ ___-____ news.tpnet.pl>...NNTP-Posting-Host \ / :194.204.165.126...X-Trace:news.tp | | net.pl918389452194.204.165.126..." |________| _| |_ Pewnie ktos chce mnie zaczarowac! ,,, .,. ___~____ Zaraz... \ / | | |________| O, tu cos jest... _| |_ ,,, =,= E... ___-____ \ / | | |________| _| |_ ,,, 6,6 E? ___-____ \ / | | |________| _| |_ ,,, o,o E??? ___v____ \ / | | |________| _| |_ ,,, o,o E! ___V____ \ / | | |________| _| |_ ,,, C o. Nie, to niemozliwe. ___ _-__ | | | Tu pisze, ze... | \ | ,,, |________| C o. I tak nikt mi nie uwierzy. /_ |_ ___ _-__ | | | | \ | ,,, |________| C o. ________ \ |_ ___ _-__ | ,,, | | | | |\( )/ | | \ | |_\___/__| |________| |X| |_ \/ |X| | | _| |_ __,,,___ |\( )/ | | \___/ | |__|X|___| |X| | | | | / \ __,,,_._ |\( )/ | | \___/ | |__|X|___| |X| | | | | / \ _.,,,_._ |\( )/ | | \___/ | |__|X|___| |X| | | | | / \ _.____._ Ach... | ,,, | |\( )/ | |_\___/__| |X| |X| | | _| |_ _.____._ ,,, |Dla mnie| o,o / | BOMBA! | _v_/ |Gratuluje /|X| \|X| | | D Z I E K U J E ! _| |_

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\\\\ c oo | _U Najlepsze w moim Palm Pilocie jest to, __=__ . . . \\ \ ze nikt nie zauwaza, ze jest to Game Boy. |\\ \\__ |_\\ / / ( {/__E ||| ||| _|||_ '--'--' pn

Ten cyfrowy telefon pozwala Panu odbierac faxy, sprawdzac poczte elektroniczna, odwiedzac strony w internecie, a nawet grac na gieldzie w Nowym Jorku. Ale jesli chce Pan pogadac, to musi sie Pan przylaczyc do grupy dyskusyjnej... //// //// c oo oo / | oU U. | __=__ , __=__ |. .| [] |. .| || || [E || || ___\\___\\//__ || || ==============| ||---|| __| ___| \ | \| | |/ _ \___ \ |\/ | | | | |__ || | | | | __|_____/ | _| _|_|_| ' '--'--' PN

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Jeden dla ochrony, drugi do towarzystwa. Nigdy nie pamietam, ktory do czego... ..... @@@ oo :: 88888 @@@@@ c ': 88 oo oo @@ -___/_ 88 .U Uo .@ / | \ __][__ __=___ | | | |. .| |. .\ | | | ||( ) )| ||()()|\\ | | | |____/\| || | \\ | | | |====|| ||____| \\ =[]==|-| / \ |/ \ \| | | \_/ | | / \ '. | | | |______| /________\ '. --__. | | | |||| |||| | '.U'__| | | | |||| |||| |-------== | | | |||| |||| | )____ | | | | /_/_ _\_\ |||' ||| _|__|__| PN L\_\_ _/_/J ||| ||| (__(____|

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.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------. | __..---"""---....___ | | .-' `-. | | .' WIDZIAŁEM WCZORAJ `. | | ( W AUTOBUSIE PIĘKNĄ | | | `. KOBIETĘ ; | | `-.______ / | | ___ `-.__ / | | ,d888888bd8b._ / /`--..-' | | ,8888888888888888888b .' / | | ,888888888888888888888 .' _.-' | | 88888888888888 ,--.,-.| .'_.-' | | ,888888888888 ,' \ `. /-' | | ,88888888888P : \ ` _.' | | `788888888b : ,""e"\""e: | | d888888888 : / | ; | | 88888888P' `: | ; | | `888L `8' ,-' `.___;`._; | | 888P 8. \ | | `88 88. ( \ | | 88 8888._ \ | | | J8 8888 `-.__..-' | | | `-'`. `888, | | | `. / ___ .-='=. .='=-. ______ | | _`._ _.' .-' ''--.._ (88 `-.".-' 88) __.-' `. | | .' .--| |'-...--' / .__ `-._ \P ___V___ 7/ .-' ..--''- \ | | | `------,$$.\ / | `--.__ `-./ .' Y `.\_.' _.--'/|/\||| \ | | | , |$/'| `. .__ && `--.__ `-._ | _.-' .-'\/\/ ..--''- ; | | :-..__ | '|/,.| `. `--.__ && `- `-|-' _.-'/\\_.--' _..-. ; | | | `' | \__*%. `--.__ | . -'# /\.-' ,'o |_ ; | | / \ ,' `. *%. `- : | _.-' ,, k | /|\ ,' `. | | / \ `.___; *%. : -' ,,,,, G | (o-"`,-.; | | | \ ( ; *%. *%. : ,,,,,,, m | / \ ( ; | |""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""| | Jim Davis 8-31 | '- mGk --------------------------------------------------------------------------------' .--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------. | __...---..._ | | .-' `-. | | .' TO BYŁA MIŁOŚĆ `. | | ( OD PIERWSZEGO ; | | `. SPOJRZENIA / | | ___ `-.__ / | | ,d888888bd8b._ / /`--..-' | | ,8888888888888888888b .' / | | ,888888888888888888888 .' _.-' | | 88888888888888 ,--.,-.| .'_.-' | | ,888888888888 ,' \ `. /-' | | ,88888888888P : \ ` _.' | | `788888888b : \ : | | d888888888 : | ; | | 88888888P' `:=====e|=e=; | | `888L `8' ,-' `.___;`._; | | 888P 8. \ | | `88 88. ( \ | | 88 888`._ \ | | | J8 888 `-.__..-' | | | `-'`. `88 , | | | `. ' / ___ .-='=. .='=-. ______ | | _`._ _.' .-' ''--.._ (88 `-.".-' 88) __.-' `. | | .' .--| |'-...--' / .__ `-._ \P ___V___ 7/ .-' ..--''- \ | | | `------,$$.\ / | `--.__ `-./ .' Y `.\_.' _.--'/|/\||| \ | | | , |$/'| `. .__ && `--.__ `-._ | _.-' .-'\/\/ ..--''- ; | | :-..__ | '|/,.| `. `--.__ && `- `-|-' _.-'/\\_.--' _..-. ; | | | `' | \__*%. `--.__ | . -'# /\.-' ,'o |_ ; | | / \ ,' `. *%. `- : | _.-' ,, k | /|\ ,' `. | | / \ `.___; *%. : -' ,,,,, G | (o-"`,-.; | | | \ ( ; *%. *%. : ,,,,,,, m | / \ ( ; | |""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""| | | '- mGk --------------------------------------------------------------------------------' .--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------. | __..---...__ | | .' `-. | | ( PRZYNAJMNIEJ `. | | \ JEŚLI O MNIE ) .--. _.-. .-. | | `._ CHODZI / ( )-' `( ).-. | | ___ `-._ __.' ,-\ )-. | | ,d888888bd8b._ `--. \ ( "KOBIETA SKACZE ) | | ,8888888888888888888b \ \ `-., Z JADĄCEGO ; | | ,888888888888888888888 \ | ( AUTOBUSU" .; | | 88888888888888 ,--.,-.| \| `.,---. ) | | ,888888888888 ,' \ `. | / \ . ,' | | ,88888888888P : \ ` _.' ( )--.._.'`-' | | `788888888b : \ : \ / | | d888888888 : | ; ,-. `---' | | 88888888P' `:=====e|=e=; ( ) | | `888L `8' `.___;`._; `-' | | 888P \ ,. | | `88 ( \ `' | | 88 \ | | | J8 _..-' | o | | `-'`. /8. | | | `. `" / ___ .-='=. .='=-. ______ | | _`._ _.' .-' ''--.._ (88 `-.".-' 88) __.-' `. | | .' .--| |'-...--' / .__ `-._ \P ___V___ 7/ .-' ..--''- \ | | | `------,$$.\ / | `--.__ `-./ .' Y `.\_.' _.--'/|/\||| \ | | | , |$/'| `. .__ && `--.__ `-._ | _.-' .-'\/\/ ..--''- ; | | :-..__ | '|/,.| `. `--.__ && `- `-|-' _.-'/\\_.--' _..-. ; | | | `' | \__*%. `--.__ | . -'# /\.-' ,'o |_ ; | | / \ ,' `. *%. `- : | _.-' ,, k | /|\ ,' `. | | / \ `.___; *%. : -' ,,,,, G | (o-"`,-.; | | | \ ( ; *%. *%. : ,,,,,,, m | / \ ( ; | |""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""| | | '- mGk --------------------------------------------------------------------------------'

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==================================================================== _ _ _ ___ __ __ _ _ _ ____ / \ | \ | |_ _| \/ | / \ | | ( ) ___| / _ \ | \| || || |\/| | / _ \ | | |/\___ \ / ___ \| |\ || || | | |/ ___ \| |___ ___) | /_/ \_\_| \_|___|_| |_/_/ \_\_____| |____/ __ ____,' '.____ _ _ _ _ _ (_____,''.____") (_)(_)(_)(_)(") " " " " " " ____ _ _ _ _ _____ _____ /| /| ,.-''-. | _ \| | / \ | \ | | ____|_ _| | |/ \ | |_) | | / _ \ | \| | _| | | |O O | ,-'. | | __/| |___ / ___ \| |\ | |___ | | | L | / . ; | |_| |_____/_/ \_\_| \_|_____| |_| |(__) '"._ ' / . \________'.,'___'-. ._. ("'._, `'.__) [lf] ` ' ==================================================================== \/ ,---------------------------------------. (oO) | here we are again at animal's planet! | vv __/`---------------------------------------' JL ==================================================================== ,---------------------------. __________________________________ | i'm mister evil-virus! | | ,. | | today let's take a look | | ,-' '-. | | at an interesting race | | ,--.,--. /____________\ | `---------------------------' | / ,, ,.. \ |,-. ,-. | | / | /| |\ ( -='/'=- ) | / | |( '= O' )| | (_ | | / | | | ( | | | "LLLL" | | \/ / | `-| .,., |-' '.____,' | ( O) / | '._**_,' \||/ | 'v ______/ | )/ | LL |__________________________________| ==================================================================== | | | ( | | | "LLLL" \/ ,---------. | `-| .,., |-' '.____, (@@) | HUMANS! | | '._**_,' \||/ vv ___/`---------' | )/ JL |__________________________ ==================================================================== ,-----------------------------------. Zz Z | they appear in a variety of looks | ,. zz `-----------------------------------' ,-' '-. ______ ,--.,--. /____________\ / \ |||||||||| / ,, ,.. \ ())()()(( |,-. ,-. | | | |,-. ,-. | |,-. ,-. | |,-. ,-. | ( -='/'=- ) ( _,/ _, ) ( O / O ) (-(_)-(_)--) ( ^ / ^ ) | (_ | | (_ | | (_ | | (_ | | (_ | | "TTTT" | | ----' | | '.__,' | | ,---. | | '||||' | '.____,' '.____,' '.____,' '.____,' '.____,' \||/ )/ ==================================================================== . ,.. ,--.,--. ,--.,--. ////\\\\ / ,, ,.. \ _ / ,, ,.. \_ | | /| |\ '" | |"' ( 'O O' ) |( '= O' )| // ( 'O O' ) \\ ,-------------. | ( | | | .. | | '"` | < | '"` | humans are | | '.**,' |) `-| .,., |-' | '.**,' | | split up in | '._""_,' () '._**_,' '._""_,' | two genders | ()n_, ,---------------------' ... | U | otherwise they couldn't reproduce | `-----------------------------------' ==================================================================== ______ ______ _______ ,--------------------------------. |o o| | | | | | their ways of reproducing are | |Q O | |,-Q-o | |,-Q-o | | very strange and they often | |L /\ | |'-O-o | | o-O-'| | do not reach their goal of re- | |______| |______| |_______| | production | `--------------------------------' ==================================================================== ,-----------------------------. + * | that results in frustration | * + /\ | and therefor the taking of | ______ -. '. ,- | legal and illegal drugs. | / \ '_\\//_' `-----------------------------' |,-. ,-. | < )> /, \ ( @ / @ ) / /' \ | (_ | |------| _______ | ,---. | |70%vol| (___|___) '.____,' ( ( ( |------| \ ' } |' | ) / `------' ( ( ___ ()====),,,,>-- ()___)_____))) ==================================================================== ,--------------------------------------------------. | the circle closes, with the drugs comes the sex | | wich isn't satisfying so they take drugs again. | | at least that's what professor bactus found out. | `--------------------------------------------------' / | that's right |__ \/ / `--------------' \ _ ( O) / ("`. 'v ___/ `._) LL ==================================================================== ,-------------------------------------. | ) ) | as you can see in this chart after | | ( ( | humans fail reproducing themselves | | ,-Q-o _o__o_ | they immediately consume drugs like | | '-O-o / \ | cigarrettes. | | (________) `-------------------------------------' | _ / |_______________________ ,'") ___/ (_.' ==================================================================== ,----------------------------------. | ___ ___ | even BEFORE the act started they | | __/ ) ( \:/ !!! | already take drugs. they already | | \,/ '.' Y _ | know by instinct that the act of | | _|_ _|_ _|_ ,'") ___| reproduction will fail. so they | |___________________ (_.' | start taking drugs right away | `----------------------------------' ==================================================================== ,-----------------------------------------------------------. | we experienced some interesting insights into the life of | | those humans today wich mostly consists of drugs and the | \/ | act of reproduction as it seems. tune in next time for | (Oo) | another episode of animal's planet. my name is mister | vv __| evil-virus! | JL `-----------------------------------------------------------' THE END

______ _ ____ ____ ____ _ _ _ _ _ _ ____ |__ __| | | __) | _ \| _ \| | | | \ | | |/ / ___) | | |_| | (__ | | \ \ |_) | | | | \| | V / (___ | | _ | __) | | ) ) _ | | | | | \___ \ | | | | | (___ | |_/ / | \ \ `-' | |\ | |\ \__) | |__|_| |_|_____) |____/|_| \_\___/|_| \_|_|(\_\___/ blatently ripping-off characters invented by JRO _____________________________________________________________________________ "Read anything interesting, Tran?" / / __________ _____ "GLUG //////////\\ \ \ GLUG ###### ////////// \\\ \~~~~(_) GLUG" _/_ ##### /// __ __ \\\ __\___(__)______________ [.[.]=-### /|| (O| |(O ||\ | | DAILY FAG | /_ )# \_ (__) _/ | |============| |__/ # \ ///\\\ / | | | \_ / ________/\________/\____ | Deranged | ANAL PROBE | .------'-..-`-----. ' .' \ \ / /. '`\____| ascii art | QUEER SHIT |/___ \_ ' . `. `\ \_/ / ` .`` \ | fartist | SUCK DICK _| \ :ALT.ASCII | ______/ `\_/ \_/..'`\.`' \ | sighted | JISM. (__) | : -ART |__| /' .` .'o . `. '.\` .`\ | in local | (__) | \~~~/ j | ____/`` . .' '. .' . '\. `'\| bar. | (__)___| \--.----' j_ |. `. ' .o ' . ' `/'` ./| | | | :__|_____.-' ____|' . ` . .' . '/`. `/_| | |____| _|_ |____ |'` . o ` . '/ .` / | | | | | |'. `. . ' . .' /____/ |___________|____________| }=====0======{ /______________/ \ /______|__|_______\ | | ___/________[__]__//-/-/-/______/ |_____/ )____ / /_/_/_/ / / / / / / _/ / |_____/ / /____/ / /______ / ___ / ___ /JRO/dp| | | | | | ---------+---------+---------+---------+---------+---------+---------+---------+ * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * __________ _____ "APPARENTLY, DRINKING //////////\\ \ \ URINE CAN PREVENT ####### ////////// \\\ \~~~~(_) MADNESS" ##_ _## /// __ __ \\\ __\___(__)______________ #[.]-[.]# /|| (O| |(O ||\ | | DAILY FAG | ( /_ ) \_ (__) _/ | |============| | ___ | \ ///\\\ / | | | l j ________/\________/\____ | Deranged | ANAL PROBE | .------'-..-`-----. ' .' \ \ / /. '`\____| ascii art | QUEER SHIT |/___ \_ ' . `. `\ \_/ / ` .`` \ | fartist | SUCK DICK _| \ :ALT.ASCII | ______/ `\_/ \_/..'`\.`' \ | sighted | JISM. (__) | : -ART |__| /' .` .'o . `. '.\` .`\ | in local | (__) | \~~~/ j | ____/`` . .' '. .' . '\. `'\| bar. | (__)___| \--.----' j_ |. `. ' .o ' . ' `/'` ./| | | | ;__.......-' ____|' . ` . .' . '/`. `/_| | |____| _|_ |_____ |'` . o ` . '/ .` / | | | | | |'. `. . ' . .' /____/ |___________|____________| }=====0======{ /______________/ \ /______|__|_______\ | | ___/________[__]__//-/-/-/______/ |_____/ _ j_____ / /_/_/_/ / / / / / / _/ / |_____/ / /____/ / /_______ / ___ / ___ /JRO/dp| | | | | | 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 "Do you reckon that's true?" / / __________ _____ //////////\\ \ \ ###### ////////// \\\ \~~~~(_) _/_ ##### /// __ __ \\\ __\___(__)______________ [.[.]=-### /|| (O| |(O ||\ | | DAILY RAG | /_ )# \_ (__) _/ | |============| |__ # \ ///\\\ / | | | \_ / ________/\________/\____ | Deranged | ANAL PROBE | .------'-..-`-----. ' .' \ \ / /. '`\____| ascii art | QUEER SHIT |/___ \_ ' . `. `\ \_/ / ` .`` \ | fartist | SUCK DICK _| \ :ALT.ASCII | ______/ `\_/ \_/..'`\.`' \ | sighted | JISM. (__) | : -ART |__| /' .` .'o . `. '.\` .`\ | in local | (__) | \~~~/ j | ____/`` . .' '. .' . '\. `'\| bar. | (__)___| \--.----' j_ |. `. ' .o ' . ' `/'` ./| | | | :__|_____.-' ____|' . ` . .' . '/`. `/_| | |____| _|_ |____ |'` . o ` . '/ .` / | | | | | |'. `. . ' . .' /____/ |___________|____________| }=====0======{ /______________/ \ /______|__|_______\ | | ___/________[__]__//-/-/-/______/ |_____/ )____ / /_/_/_/ / / / / / / _/ / |_____/ / /____/ / /______ / ___ / ___ /JRO/dp| | | | | | 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 8 "NAH! IT JUST MAKES __________ _____ YOU HOMOPHOBIC //////////\\ \ \ WITH BAD BREATH" ###### ////////// \\\ \~~~~(_) #### _\_ /// __ __ \\\ __\___(__)______________ ###=-[.].] /|| (O| |(O ||\ | | DAILY RAG | #( _\ \_ (__) _/ | |============| # __| \ ///\\\ / | | | \ _/ ________/\________/\____ | Deranged | ANAL PROBE | .------'-..-`-----. ' .' \ \ / /. '`\____| ascii art | QUEER SHIT |/___ \_ ' . `. `\ \_/ / ` .`` \ | fartist | SUCK DICK _| \ :ALT.ASCII | ______/ `\_/ \_/..'`\.`' \ | sighted | JISM. (__) | : -ART |__| /' .` .'o . `. '.\` .`\ | in local | (__) | \~~~/ j | ____/`` . .' '. .' . '\. `'\| bar. | (__)___| \--.----' j_ |. `. ' .o ' . ' `/'` ./| | | | :__.......-' ____|' . ` . .' . '/`. `/_| | |____| _|_ |____ |'` . o ` . '/ .` / | | | | | |'. `. . ' . .' /____/ |___________|____________| }=====0======{ /______________/ \ /______|__|_______\ | | ___/________[__]__//-/-/-/______/ |_____/ _ j____ / /_/_/_/ / / / / / / _/ / |_____/ / /____/ / /______ / ___ / ___ /JRO/dp| | | | | | # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # endendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendend endendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendendnednedned

How to build a rocket Introduction ============ The way this works is very simple (just like a toy pop gun or pneumatic spud gun) the bottle fills with air and the air begins to compress and it builds up pressure. This pressure eventually gets strong enough to blow out the the stopper, but since the stopper is on the ground it pushes the bottle up into the air. /\ / \ / \ /______\ | | | | | | | | | | | | /| || |\ / | || | \ / | || | \ /___| || |___\ | | \ / || || I built this with my kids last weekend. It went higher than our house. Materials Needed ================ . Empty plastic fizzy drink bottle (2 litre) . One cork or rubber stopper (with hole through) . Car tyre foot pump . Adaptor for inflating footballs . Pole or bamboo cane . card or plastic tube . Adhesive tape . Card or plastic to make cone and fins/wings (optional) SAFETY NOTE =========== Only use a plastic fizzy drink bottle because these are designed to withstand internal pressure. You will probably get wet. How to make it ============== -= STEP 1 =- Push the pole into the ground and check that the tube slides easily the full length. || ||<---------- pole || || || | | | | | |<--------- tube | | | | |__| || || || || || || _______________||______________________ -= STEP 2 =- Tape the tube to the the bottle. ____ || || / \ __| | | | | | | | |__|________| |___________| | | | |__| | | | | | | | | | \ / `-..-' -= STEP 3 =- Take the cork or stopper (should fit tightly in the bottle) and push the adaptor into the hole. This should be a tight fit. You could use vasoline to help make a good seal. ________ | | | | | | | | | |||| | | |||| | <----- stopper | |||| | | |||| | |__||||__| || / \ | | <------- adaptor |____| -= STEP 4 =- You can attach a nose cone and fins/wings to the bottle at this stage although the rocket will fly without them. /\ / \ / \ /______\ __| | | | | | | | |__|________| |___________| | | | |_/| || |\ / | || | \ / | || | \ /___| || |___\ | | \ / ||__|| -= STEP 5 =- Fill bottle 1/4 of the way with water. Firmly push in stopper (with adapter fitted). /\ / \ / \ /______\ __| | | | | | | | |__|________| |___________| | | | |_/| || |\ / | || | \ / | || | \ /___|:::||:::|___\ |::::::::| \::::::/ ||__|| || -= STEP 6 =- Slide bottle onto pole. || /\ || / \ || / \ || /______\ ||| | | | | | | | |__|________| |___________| | | | |__| || |\ ||| || | \ /||| || | \ /_|||...||...|___\ |||::::::::| || \::::::/ || ||__|| _______________||____||________________ -= STEP 7 =- Slightly raise the rocket and connect the foot pump. Start pumping. (may take 2-5 min. to until the pressure forces out the cork) /\ / \ || / \ || /______\ ||| | | | | | | | |__|________| |___________| | | | |__| || |\ ||| || | \ /||| || | \ /_|||...||...|___\ |||::::::::| || \::::::/ || ||__|| || || || \\_______________ _______________||______`--------------- Have fun. End.

_____ / \ Hmmm...where did I see (____/\ ) that toilet roll? ...... |___ U?(____ _\L. | \ ___ / /"""\ /.-' | |\ | ( / _/u | \___|_)_| \| \\ / / \_(___ __) | \\ / / | | | | ) _/ / ) | | _\__/.-' /___( | | _/ __________/ \ | | // / ( ) | | ( \__|___\ \______ /__|____| \ (___\ |______)_/ \ |\ \ \ / \ | \__ ) )___/ \ \ )/ /__( ___ | /_//___| \_________ _/ ( / OUuuu \ `----'(____________) Mikey

Ode to Pyramid Schemes and Other Assorted Internet Phenomena by Matthew Thomas \~/ A long, long time ago, ,"\ I can still remember how those schemes used to make me / |_`. smile ... / (__ \ And I knew that if I ruled the world, J __) ) Then I would send those jerks to hell `.___|_,' And maybe I'd be happy, for a while ... _ _,-'/\ But bulk e-mailers made me shiver _,-',='/ \ Every second, they'd deliver \`---+'`-._\ Junk news on my doorstep, \ / _,-' I couldn't take one more step ... \,-' ______ (_=o___) Until now, I've never tried | | To filter out that spam deep-fried | Diet | But something touched me deep inside | SPAM | The day, my server, died. (______) ,--. `_' So ... (_.__) -(_)- Bye bye scam, you're just pie in the sky , . Drove the Albanians crazy, and sucked them all dry _.-*-._ Them good old admins let this spam slip by \_______/.-. Singing, `This'll be the day that I die; (__._._) This'll be the day that I die'. /L. Do you have faith in MLM, /.L:`. And do you think Good Times will cause mayhem, /. J:::`. Because your e-mail tells you so? /. . L::::> Do you believe in pyramids /. . .J::,' Free Money, and all that stuff that kids /_______L' Circulate to make the Internet real slow? +-------------+ |# ad me | Well I know the Net is full of crime |`-# Re:ad me | 'Cause I get this spam stuff all the time |# EASY MONEY | But I can't just run away |# XXX PICS!! | Because I haven't checked Usenet yet today ... +-------------+ ,-. |66A I am a lonely teenage computer nerd /`'M\ With a dual boot of Linux and Hurd, (| `M\ But I foresaw the Reich of Gates the Third _>\ |M) The day, my server, died. '-_)=(_,' ,--. `_' I started singing: (_.__) -(_)- Bye bye scam, you're just pie in the sky , . Drove the Albanians crazy, and sucked them all dry _.-*-._ Them good old admins let this spam slip by \_______/.-. Singing, `This'll be the day that I die; (__._._) This'll be the day that I die'. X Now for nigh on ten years we've been on our own ____/ \__o____ While the Web grows fat on it's commercial throne, /`-'\ T But that's not how it used to be; . / ) \ o While the gopher sang for academic jocks /`--/--'\ /\ In Veronica's closet and Archie's box, :`-./A_,-'/> U Tim invented the H T tepee ... And while Berners-Lee was looking down ,===-. Andreesen stole his thorny crown || \\ Enquire Within was adjourned || \ _ And a 404 was returned `==> [_] And while Oracular Priests gave out their marks / The Kibologists practised in the park R e l o a d And I sang a ditty in the dark The day, my server, died. ,--. `_' I was singing: (_.__) -(_)- Bye bye scam, you're just pie in the sky , . Drove the Albanians crazy, and sucked them all dry _.-*-._ Them good old admins let this spam slip by \_______/.-. Singing, `This'll be the day that I die; (__._._) This'll be the day that I die'. _ __ _ With custom tags, and a file mime // /-.\ \\ The browsers began to waste our time // // \\ Eight megabytes high and growing fast; << // >> And as Id Est and the Lizard fought in the grass, \\ `' // The open-sourcers caught the pass \\ [] // With the Mosaic all in pieces, in the dust. Now the smell of Java was sweet perfume ,-. But the Borg was playing a fighting tune (_|L ) We all got ready to dance _`& `_ Oh, but we never got the chance ... \`"'|)) 'Cause the programmers tried to take the field _ L_J_ but the .java classes refused to yield ``-===-' ' Do you remember what Sun's tests revealed The day, the server, died. ,--. `_' We had been singing: (_.__) -(_)- Bye bye OS, you're just pie in the sky , . We don't need you any more, so we'll kiss you goodbye _.-*-._ But the good old Borg were drinking decaf, and why? \_______/.-. 'Cause that would be the day that they die (__._._) That would be the day that they die. 1 (?) And meanwhile, ASCII artists in our places 2 ) A generation lost in tabs and spaces 3 .._o Trying to make our pics look right; 4 ..://\/ So keep your sigs to four lines or three 5 ..:_/\ And make sure that you use PGP 6 ..:/ 'Cause crypto is freedom's only friend ... And as I watched Sanford Wallace on the stage |"`--..,--'"| My hands were clenched in fists of rage |[M] -|NEWS:| No angel born in hell |[M] -|Spam | Could break that Satan's spell; |`"--.|legal| And as the flames came flooding in |`"--.|,--'"| alt.silly.newsgroups.clogged.up.tin "`--.|,--'" I saw the Borg wear an evil grin The day, my server, died. ,--. `_' I was singing: (_.__) -(_)- Bye bye scam, you're just pie in the sky , . Drove the Albanians crazy, and sucked them all dry _.-*-._ Them good old admins let this spam slip by \_______/.-. Singing, `This'll be the day that I die; (__._._) This'll be the day that I die'. ,---. I met a girl, Emily Postnews /'_'_`\ And I asked for her to cure my blues, // ~<~`)\ But she just smiled and cancelled me; (( `-'/_ I went down to the cybercafe ) (-<\ Where I'd heard you didn't have to pay ,-' `.\\ But the man there said that the Net was down today ... Because the y2k had rolled around \ \ ,-./_ . And the Net had crashed into the ground , , \ ) And not a byte was spoken ( BOOM! ) ) The software all was broken ... ( / And the three men I admire most, ` / `-' \ ' Stallman, Linus, and the Oracular Ghost, / \ They took a Chevy to the coast, The day, our servers, died. ,--. `_' And they were singing: (_.__) -(_)- Bye bye spam, you're just pie in the sky , . The Net is all gone, but let's not just cry _.-*-._ We can start again one day, if only we try \_______/.-. And I said, `That'll be the day that I die; (__._._) That'll be the day that I die'. ,--. `_' We're all singing: (_.__) -(_)- Bye bye spam, you're just pie in the sky , . The Net is all gone, but let's not just cry _.-*-._ We can start again one day, if only we try \_______/.-. Even if that is the day that we die; (__._._) Even if that is the day ... that we die'. Copyright (C) 1998 Matthew Thomas (with apologies to Don McLean). This work may be freely copied, forwarded, or otherwise reproduced, as long as this copyright message is included.

___________________________________________________ | | ________________________________________________ ____________| przyciemnione okulary kryjące zimne, bezlitosne i | | | | | nieludzkie oczy ciała pedagogicznego | | dystynkcje - określają miejsce w hierarchii | | |___________________________________________________| | aparatu kontroli od magistra do profesora; |________ | | tylko jednostki szczególnie bezwzględne | | | | i zasłużone mogą liczyć na szlify profesorskie | | d8"8b. |________________________________________________| | dP"78888| `8888. | 8 | ,8 | .e._8b | 8' | 7" | `8"7b | d8. | 8' | `"8 | ,d8' | 8____d88b_d88b_____8" | 8. 788" "88P .8' | `8 ( _ ) .8' | 8. e"""""e .8 | `8. beeed 8' __________________________________________ | ._____`8. .8______. | | 8""""""""8. 8 `8._ __.8" ,P ,8"""""""8 | dobrze skrojony garnitur wedle ostatniej | ____________________ `8""""""""8 8._ /88\ __,8' ,8"""""""8' | belferskiej mody ma podkreślać dystans | | | d8 ,P .d. ""\88/"" d8' ,8' 8 | między studentami a ciałem pedagogicznym | | ciało pedagogiczne |_________________8P____ `""d" 8. 88 .8P ___,8' 8_________| oraz wywoływać u nich poczucie niższości | |____________________| ,8' ,8' `8. .88. 8' `P""" 8 |__________________________________________| d8 `8. `8. `b,88888' `7b._ dP 8 8P 7b 7b. `8888' .d8P""' 8' 8 ,8' `8. `8. 88'.d8P" 8 8. d8 7b 7b.d88P" ,8 8b _____ 8P `8. d888" d8 "8 _.eed8P"8888b _________ ,8' 7b 8"" ,8' 8b_.ed8"" `888' | d8 `8. 88 d8 "88"' | 8P 7b 88 88 88 ,8' 8. | 888b.._ `8. 88 dP "8. | `"""8888b 88 88 88 ,8'..od888P""' _______________________|_____________________ ___________________________________________________ 78. 88 8P""" | | | | _ 7b 88 88 88 dP | pejcz - symbol władzy i kontroli; narzędzie | | telefon komórkowy - pomocny przy koordynacji | 8__7b 88 dP | ucisku i kary; oficjalnie służący jako | | i prowadzenia akcji zaczepnych i pacyfikacyjnych; | 8888P 88______ d8 | wskaźnik; ostatnio wypierany przez | | płynące zeń dyrektywy i instrukcje uwalniają |______ 88888""""88""""88"""""""8 | wskaźnik laserowy, którego wersja o | | ciało pedagogiczne przed ciężarem podejmowania | 88888 88 ==88 8 | zwiększonej mocy również świetnie się | | samodzielnych decyzji i łączącej się z nimi | 8mGk8""""""""""""""""""""b | sprawdza w roli narzędzia kary | | odpowiedzialności | 8888' `b |_____________________________________________| |___________________________________________________| ,8 8. ,8' `8. d8 8b ,8' 88 `8. dP 88 8b ,8' 88 `8 dP 88 8. ,8' 88 8b ,8P 88 `8. dP 88 8b dP 88 `8. d8' 88 8b 8P 88 8b "8b. 88 __8P `""8b. 88 _.d88"""""' `8"b. 88 `""8 8 88 8. 8""""""""""db"""""""""8' 8 88 .P 8. 88 8' _________________________________________________ `8 88 8 | | 8 88 8 | lśniące oficerki - niejednokrotnie lżony i |_______ 8___ 88 8 | poniżany student zmuszany jest do ich całowania | 8 88 8 |_________________________________________________| 8 88 8 8 88 8 8 88 8 8 88 8 8 88 8 ,8 88 b ______...d88"' d8 `"88b...__ ,P"""""""" 88 """""b 8. 88 `8 `888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888

___________________________ ______________________________ | | | | | WYGRAJ WYCIECZKE DO | | DZIEWCZYNO, MNIE ZATRZYMAJĄ | | AMERYKAŃSKIEJ SIEDZIBY | __________________ | NA LOTNISKU ZA WYGLĄD | | MIROSOFTU !!! | | | | A CIEBIE ZA PRZEMYT BRONI... | | __________| | WIESZ CO, TRZEBA | |__________________________ __| |__________ / | KONIECZNIE | ,-._ || |/| / | WZIĄĆ UDZIAŁ.... | ,' ; `. `. |/ | / , |________ _______| `._;_ `.' `-' ,'"""". ________ |/ .( ,.". | | '. `. /`. `. `. ,888888888b-. ,'.'`-' ,,'. | | .-._.' _ |---`. | | ,888888888888 | _,' .','.'. . | | `. .' `. / .. | '| ,88888888888888 | .' `. ,' , .` |/ ,`--' / \ `=.::::||' | 888888888888888 | `- ( '`". '' ____ ,' / \ `"""-)`|||| 888888888888888 | `._,-' ,888888b. `._. / \ __/ /|||' 888888888888888 | `. `;""788888 `. /\ \ .d8888888.|' 888888888888888 | ` |=---88888 / , / \ \ _ .88888888888. 888 mGk 8888888 | "==||= `._ d88888 / \-.`._\______\____..-':88888888888888P 88888888888888P-' .|||. '__d888888 / -\._`_____________ ,d888888888888'8888 """"""""""""""""""""""| \ / |_|_ ,"""""---...____\__ \d88888888888888P' 8888 ______________________| | | ,888888.; `8888.--.88888"' | | | | | | ,88888888| 8888|__|>88"______| | |__| | | ,88888888888 ,-..._____________.8888F | || | ' .78"88888888888 | |"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" || ___| \_.' / `7888888888 | | || .'' `-._ .'/ / 888888888 \ | || / /888e._ `"' / 888888888 || || /,.|888888888e._.' 888888888 || || '|'`88888888888888b.d888888888 || || `"88888888888888888888888'| || || ,e..d888888888888888888888 | || || 7888888888'`8888888888888P |____|| || """888' `""888888" / )| ,-'' / | `._..-' |__________________________________________

| A WCZORAJ TO NAWET | TAŃCZYLISMY. | SPADLIŚCIE |_________ ________ | RAZEM || | Z ŁÓŻKA, || | PRAWDA? || |______ ___ |/ | NO, BEZ PRZESADY. || | NIE NAZWAŁABYM || ,===.===. | TEGO OD RAZU |/ / .--'--. \ | TAŃCEM... / / \ \ |________ ________ ..--`````. / / __ __ \ \ || ,` `. `. ||=(__)-(__)=|| || ,' | | || || |/ |_ |_ , ': '-' :' ____ (_)----\ \ ,' \:. ___ .:/ ,88888888b. ,' ,./ \ ,' \\::...::// d88"""888888b `,-, ;#,' | ||`-----'|| d8P. "7888 ;####,\ | ___|||| ||||___ ,8': `..--._888 `"""' | |__ .d8888888888888888888b. dP `& `--' 8;;====" _.eeee88888888888be. d88888888888888888888888b " `-- ," ;8 d888888888888888888888. d8888888888888888888888888b ______`.____.' ,888 d88888888888888888888888 .888888888888888888888888888. .d8888888b __.d8 |__ ,888888888888888888888888 d888888888888888888888888888b .d888888888888888 888b. d888888888888888888888888 88888888888888888888888888888 88888888888888888 88888 d888888888888888888888888" 88888888888888888888888888888 88888888888888888 88888 "888888888888888888888888 | 8888888888888888888 | 88888888888888888 "8888 | 888888888888888" ; | 8888888888888888888 | """"8888888888888 `"""' | 88888888888888P ' | 8888888888888888888 | | 8888888888888. ; .---. 88888888888888" ; | 8888888888888888888 | | 88888888888888. ; |`-`| `"""""""""""""--.; # ___| 88.---.88888888888; ;_______| 888888888888888__; ___________________| |____________..._ `. //__ `._ `|`-`| .-' .' | ' |__ ,. __..--`` `. `-.// `._ | | .-' .-' `. `-._ .---. ( ` __...---``` `.`.`.`. `|__ ,\_.-' .-' # `-._ `-._ |`-'| `.__..--`` `'`'` ( .-'_ // `-._ `-. ,:__| `.____..-' `-.// `-._ ' ) `--...--"" `-..__.' |mGk| `---'

,////||\\\. | | .-----------------------. | ||///. | | | | Kochanie, podaj mi | ,| ||||//_.--.| | | | suszarkę do włosów... \ || '\\\\' | /\ | | `------------------------. \ ./'',/'_ || '\| |_/ _) | | `.: '|'.|' \ \'\. || _.'| //|| | | `. '. `. \\. _ || ,' | ` ._| | | /\' ' '.'\.) || ,' | `__. ; | | .....___' |.)`' || / | / \\_; | | : | ,.|' ||`. || / | /\__/\/ \ | | _______.-'"": ||. . | | ||\\ || / `' || ' \ | | ,-' : /|.| | | ' | '| || / ______|| | | | ,. .-' \ : (|'|| '| | | | || .-' || `-.-------Y | | \ \_.'\ \ , : |'|| | | .| ' || ||_ )-.__ \ | | ,` \ \____; : |||'.|.| |.'| || __/ `---.' / (J|==| | ,',' _.'\_.-' ; : ';.|.||'| \|||| ==== `| __.-' / | / \ |==| |(_; ; .' ;` : ; |' ' '|''' __||_ | . / | / /. `--' | (_; ; ;`. :;`-.,. ' __ | /,--. | | `. / // / /`-.. | (_; ;`. `. ; / /`-' .`.'| / | | . `. \ // \/ / .-\ | | .-. ; `. `. ;`-./ /_ ))) ) / | | `. `. ,.\_// `' \ ._)|`-| |-| | ; `. `. ; `./.=====================| `. / ;_/ \ |_|.-| |-| | ; `;:: | | `/ / | `..' | | '-' ; ;:: | | `./---| | | ; ;`::. | | | | | ; ; `:`. `=====================| | | | : ; ;`: `. `. | /\ | | | ;: `' : : `._ | / | | | | ; : ; ; `._ | / | | | | ; : `._; `._ | / | | | | ; : : `. | / | | | | ; : :` `. | / | | | | : : : ` | | / | | | | : : : : | | | | | | ` : : ; | | | | | | `: :.-' | | | | | | : : | | .' | | | `._ : | | | | | | `------------' | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | / | | | | | | | | | / | | | | | | | | | / | |_____| | | | | | | / | | _.'`-._ | | | |:. | |:. / | |` mGk `-. | | |.-::::._-::::._ / | |__,________) | | (::::::::)::::::) | | """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""

| <uzi> ty jestes zona admina? | |______________________ _____ | Ty, | _..._ | | | to w ogóle |_________ ,-' `. | | | nie jest ___..--`` ,' `. , | Wkompilowal mnie | | | zabawne. | / _; `. | sobie w jądro. |,' | ___________| / ,--'/ ,-' |______ ________ ' | //// ,-'==[] `. / ,' | //'//,-':. _| ,' /,' | /'/,//' :::.-/===" /' | ,d888888b ,' `::/ | ,d888888888b ,d888b. | ,d8888888888 ,888888888b. . ______ | ,88888888888; ,d888888888888 `, ,| |. | ,88888888888; 88888888888"""; `, || | `.| ,888888888888 ; `8888888'---p ,-' || | | ,888888 8888; ,--. ;`8P888P ; `. || | | ,8888888 88'| ,|""| ;/`88-._,` ,' || | | ,88888888 88 | |`--; _/ ;/ # || | | 888888888 8' |,' __,' ,888888b. // || | | ,888888888 8 ,' ,' ,888888888. .""// || | | 8888888888 P' ,' 88888888888. ,' .--` || | | ,8888888888 ; `------..._ 888888888888 ; ,' `|_____|_,'| 88888888888._.'`-........_ )88888888888/\ | | ,---. | | ,8888888888888 ,`;8888888888888 \ | | __ |`-'| | | 88888888888888 /| 8888888P88888. `.,'_;-'.-' |mGk| ,' | 88888888888888 || 8888888/`8888''._,'__,'.=-=-=. | | ,' | | | || 88888888. `7' / /'|"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""| | | || ;888888888. `._/ / |_______________________________| | | \|,' `8888888888. ' / | | | | 8. `8888888888._/ | | | | `8. `8888888888. | |

| Równoprawna struktura | warstwowa. |_____________ ______ | | | Mogę być | | | na górze. | | |____ __ | / | ,' |/ |' __..__ _.--'""""""'-. ,-"" ""----""" `-.__ __,-' `""`-. ,-""' `. ,$$" .oooO Oooo. `. ,$$' __ .oo0 ___ ( ) ___ ( ) `. \|/ ,$$' _.d888"2( )888888\ (8888888) /. `. ,$$. $$$' _.d888888' 3; /88888888\_)88888( /8888b. : `"$$$$$$$$ __..d8888888888(_,ed8bd8888888888888888888888888888b _ ; `$$$$$$$" `-._.-.-'|`" $$$$$$' | _ ,$$$$$$ | ,$$' ,$$$$$$|_______________________________________________________________| $$( _,$$$$$$' | | `$$.__,s$$$$$$$$' | | `$$$$$$$$$$$$" | | `$$$$$ | | `$$$$ | | `$$$. | | `$$` |_______________________________________________________ mGk _|

__________________________________________________________________________________________ | I potraktuj to jako priorytet. | | To bardzo ważne. | | ___ | | ,888888b. \ ,d8888. | | 88P' `" \ 88888888888. | | `8P ,=..=.' Hmm.. jestem naprawdę zajęty \ _ "88888 | | |( ** ) ostatnio. Jeśli naprawdę się postaram ||/_`____"8 | | C `-/\-'; możesz to mieć za dwa ||e ; /_\| | | | `' ; tygodnie. C`-' ,"|| | | `. == , "`. \_/| | | _) (_ ,._,-._ / ._,' / | | _.-`-.__.-""-. .' ) / / | | | / \ .' ,-`./ / ,/`-._ `----|_|' | | ; , . \ ) ,',". | | '._ ,'_|_ | | | ,. ( ) . | ( ,' ( e_ ,',' `-. ,8',' `. | | | || `||' | | ) ((8 `-'_) | | `-. 88 | | | | | || !! | | ( |` d87 | | `-. 8' | | | | | || | | ) | d88bd8. ,',' `. ,8 | | | | | `| | | ( | "88888' | | | 88 | | | | `. | | | `'. |"" | | | 88 | | | | `.|_________| | |_-.| ,',' | 88 | | | | |____[_]____\ / ,' `-.) _.-'\ | | ,' 88 | | | | | | I | |/ ..| `. `. _,' )= \ \| .-' `8 | | | | |/ I \| | | `. `..' _,-'= = \ """""""""""""""""". |__|___| | | | " | | | ,' ,'_._= = = \ ," ," ". []_'---' | | | | | |\ _,' `._,'"" )= = = \ ," ," ". | / | | | | | | | | `'. _.'"= = _.-' ".__,"______________," | \\\/ | | | | | | | `. _.' \_.-"" | | ` '||' `._.' | |_______________________||___________________________________________________________ mGk _| __________________________________________________________________________________________ | | | A zatem będę musiał poczekać. | | ___ Dzięki Greg. | | ,888888b. .888| | 88P' `" \ .88888| | `8P ,=..=.' \ 88888"| | |( ** ) \ 8"____| | C `-/\-'; |/_\ ;| | | `' ; Nie ma sprawy. ||", | | `. == , |\_/ | | _) (_ ,._,-._ / \ | | _.-`-.__.-""-. .' ) / | | | / \ .' ,-`./ / ,/`-._ `|_|-| | ; , . \ ) ,',". | | '._ _|_`,| | | ,. ( ) . | ( ,' ( e_ ,',' `-. .' `,`8| | | || `||' | | ) ((8 `-'_) | | `-. | | 8| | | || !! | | ( |` d87 | | `-. | | `| | | || | | ) | d88bd8. ,',' `. | | | | | `| | | ( | "88888' | | | | | | | `. | | | `'. |"" | | | | | | | `.|_________| | |_-.| ,',' | | | | | |____[_]____\ / ,' `-.) _.-'\ | | ,' | | | | | | I | |/ ..| `. `. _,' )= \ \| .-' | | | | |/ I \| | | `. `..' _,-'= = \ """""""""""""""""". |___|__| | | " | | | ,' ,'_._= = = \ ," ," ". `---`_[| | | | | |\ _,' `._,'"" )= = = \ ," ," ". | \ | | | | | | | `'. _.'"= = _.-' ".__,"______________," \/// | | | | | | | `. _.' \_.-"" | | ` '||' `._.' | |_______________________||___________________________________________________________ mGk _| ______________________________________________________________________________ | | | | | ___ | | ,888888b. | | 88P' `" | | `8P ,=..=.' | | |( ** ) | | C `-/\-'; | | | `' ; | | `. == , | | _) (_ ,._,-._ | | _.-`-.__.-""-. .' ) | | / \ .' ,-`./ ,/`-._ | | ; , . \ ) ,',". | | '._ | | | ,. ( ) . | ( ,' ( e_ ,',' `-. | | | || `||' | | ) ((8 `-'_) | | `-. | | | || !! | | ( |` d87 | | `-. | | | || | | ) | d88bd8. ,',' `. | | | `| | | ( | "88888' | | | | | `. | | | `'. |"" | | | | | `.|_________| | |_-.| ,',' | | | |____[_]____\ / ,' `-.) _.-'\ | | ,' | | | | I | |/ ..| `. `. _,' )= \ \| .-' | | |/ I \| | | `. `..' _,-'= = \ """""""""""""""""". | | | " | | | ,' ,'_._= = = \ ," ," ". | | | | | |\ _,' `._,'"" )= = = \ ," ," ". | | | | | | | `'. _.'"= = _.-' ".__,"______________," | | | | | | | `. _.' \_.-"" | | ` '||' `._.' | |_______________________||_______________________________________________ mGk _| ______________________________________________________________________________ | Stary! To co chciał Stef zajmuje 10 minut. | | Łącznie z usuwaniem błędów. | | ___ | | ,888888b. / | | 88P' `" / | | `8P ,=..=.' / | | |( ** ) | | C `-/\-'; | | | `' ; Cholera, skończyły mi się rakiety. | | `. _, , | | _) (_ ,._,-._ / | | _.-`-.__.-""-. .' ) / | | / \ .' ,-`./ / ,/`-._ | | ; , . \ ) ,',". | | '._ | | | ,. ( ) . | ( ,' ( e_ ,',' `-. | | | || `||' | | ) ((8 `-'_) | | `-. | | | || !! | | ( |` d87 | | `-. | | | || | | ) | d88bd8. ,',' `. | | | `| | | ( | "88888' | | | | | `. | | | `'. |"" | | | | | `.|_________| | |_-.| ,',' | | | |____[_]____\ / ,' `-.) _.-'\ | | ,' | | | | I | |/ ..| `. `. _,' )= \ \| .-' | | |/ I \| | | `. `..' _,-'= = \ """""""""""""""""". | | | " | | | ,' ,'_._= = = \ ," ," ". | | | | | |\ _,' `._,'"" )= = = \ ," ," ". | | | | | | | `'. _.'"= = _.-' ".__,"______________," | | | | | | | `. _.' \_.-"" | | ` '||' `._.' | |_______________________||_______________________________________________ mGk _|

.-------------------------------------------------------------------. | | Kochany | | | Miales robic router. | | |________________ ___ | | / ,' | | /,' | | /' | | | | | | __.....___ _.--'""""""'-. | | ,-"" """"" `-.__ | | __,-' `""`-. | | ,-""' `. | | ; .oooO Oooo. `. | | ; ( ) ___ ( )______ .oo0 _ 0oo. : | | : .8\ (8888888) /.8888888( )888( )8b : | | `. _.d888\_)88888( /8888888888\ :888; /888b. ; | | ____`.d8888888888888888888888888888888o88d8bd88888888b______;__ | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |_________________________________________________________ mGk _| | '-------------------------------------------------------------------' .-------------------------------------------------------------------. | | W ten sposob mozemy | | | zrobic najwyzej nowy. | | |_________________ __ | | | Moja sliczna. | | / | | | W ten sposob sie nie robi | | / | | | nowych routerow... | |/ | | |__ ______________________| | | `. \ | | `.\ | | `\ ____....------....____ | | ,' `-. | | ,' `-. | | ; _ _ `. | | __..-' / ) _______ ( \ `. | | _.----..--""" .d/ (8888888888888) \b. `. | | ,' .8( ).oo08880oo.( )8. : | | : 888.oooO( )888( )Oooo.88. : | | `. ;88888888888\ :888; /888888888. ; | | ____`._________________,d8888888888888o88d8bd88888888888.___;__ | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |_________________________________________________________ mGk _| | '-------------------------------------------------------------------' .-------------------------------------------------------------------. | | Jak to nie? | | | Bierze sie admina | | | i rznie male routerki ... | | |__________________ _____ | | | / | | | / | | |/ | | | | ____....------....____ | | ,' `-. | | ,' `-. | | ; _ _ `. | | __..-' / ) _______ ( \ `. | | _.----..--""" .d/ (8888888888888) \b. `. | | ,' .8( ).oo08880oo.( )8. : | | : 888.oooO( )888( )Oooo.88. : | | `. ;88888888888\ :888; /888888888. ; | | ____`._________________,d8888888888888o88d8bd88888888888.___;__ | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |_________________________________________________________ mGk _| | '-------------------------------------------------------------------'

____________________________________________________________________________________ | Greg. Właśnie słyszałem, że ___ _ _ __ __ _ | | .8888b, nie robisz już nic innego tylko | _ ) | /_\ | \/ | | | | .88888888888 grasz na komputerze, i że czas jaki | _ \ |__ / _ \| |\/| |_| | | 88888" _ na to poświęcasz jest grubo przesadzony. |___/____/_/ \_\_| |_(_) | | 8"____'_\|| Sądze, że już czas abyś ___ _ _ __ __ _ | | |/_\ ; a|| / zachował się odpowiedzialnie. | _ ) | /_\ | \/ | | | | ||". `-'D / ,._,-._ | _ \ |__ / _ \| |\/| |_| | | |\_/ ;`-" / .' ) |___/____/_/ \_\_| |_(_) | | \ `.__. .' ,-`./ ,/`-._ | | | \ ) ,',". | | '._ | | `|_|----' ( ,' ( e_ ,',' `-. | | _|_`. ) ((8 `-'_) | | `-. | | ,' `.`8. ( |` d88 | | `-. | | | | 88 ) | d88bd8. ,',' `. | | | | `8 ( | "88888' | | | | | | | 8. `'. |"" | | | | | | | 88 |_-.| ,',' | | | | | 88 ,' `-.) _.-'\ | | ,' | | | | 88 ..| `. `. _,' )= \ \| .-' | | | | 88 | | `. `..' _,-'= = \ """""""""""""""""". | | | | 8' | | ,' ,'_._= = = \ ," ," ". | | |___|__| | |\ _,' `._,'"" )= = = \ ," ," ". | | `---`_[] | | `'. _.'"= = _.-' ".__,"______________," | | | \ | | | `. _.' \_.-"" | | \/// | '||' `._.' | |___|_____|__________________||________________________________________________ mGk _| ____________________________________________________________________________________ | Rzeczy które proszę abyś zrobił | | .8888b, są niezwykle ważne dla tej firmy. | | .88888888888 Twój brak produktywności oraz | | 88888" _ kompletne zaniedbywanie obowiazków ___ _____ ___ | | 8"____'_\|| biurowych jest bardzo niepokojące. | _ \/ _ \ \ / / | | | |/_\ ; a|| / | _/ (_) \ \/\/ /|_| | | ||". `-'D / ,._,-._ |_| \___/ \_/\_/ (_) | | |\_/ ;`-" / .' ) | | \ `.__. .' ,-`./ ,/`-._ | | | \ ) ,',". | | '._ | | `|_|----' ( ,' ( e_ ,',' `-. | | _|_`. ) ((8 `-'_) | | `-. | | ,' `.`8. ( |` d88 | | `-. | | | | 88 ) | d88bd8. ,',' `. | | | | `8 ( | "88888' | | | | | | | 8. `'. |"" | | | | | | | 88 |_-.| ,',' | | | | | 88 ,' `-.) _.-'\ | | ,' | | | | 88 ..| `. `. _,' )= \ \| .-' | | | | 88 | | `. `..' _,-'= = \ """""""""""""""""". | | | | 8' | | ,' ,'_._= = = \ ," ," ". | | |___|__| | |\ _,' `._,'"" )= = = \ ," ," ". | | `---`_[] | | `'. _.'"= = _.-' ".__,"______________," | | | \ | | | `. _.' \_.-"" | | \/// | '||' `._.' | |___|_____|__________________||________________________________________________ mGk _| ____________________________________________________________________________________ | ___ _ _ __ __ _ | | .8888b, | _ ) | /_\ | \/ | | | | .88888888888 | _ \ |__ / _ \| |\/| |_| | | 88888" _ |___/____/_/ \_\_| |_(_) | | 8"____'_\|| _ __ _ ___ ___ ___ __ __ _ | | |/_\ ; a|| | |/ / /_\ __| _ )/ _ \ / _ \| \/ | | | | ||". `-'D ,._,-._ | ' < / _ \__| _ \ (_) | (_) | |\/| |_| | | |\_/ | .' ) |_|\_\/_/ \_\ |___/\___/ \___/|_| |_(_) | | \ |_ .' ,-`./ ,/`-._ | | | | ) ,',". | | '._ | | `|_|----' ( ,' ( e_ ,',' `-. | | _|_`. ) ((8 `-'_) | | `-. | | ,' `.`8. ( |` d88 | | `-. | | | | 88 ) | d88bd8. ,',' `. | | | | `8 ( | "88888' | | | | | | | 8. `'. |"" | | | | | | | 88 |_-.| ,',' | | | | | 88 ,' `-.) _.-'\ | | ,' | | | | 88 ..; `. `. _,' )= \ \| .-' | | | | 88 | | `. `..' _,-'= = \ """""""""""""""""". | | | | 8' | | ,' ,'_._= = = \ ," ," ". | | |___|__| | |\ _,' `._,'"" )= = = \ ," ," ". | | `---`_[] | | `'. _.'"= = _.-' ".__,"______________," | | | \ | | | `. _.' \_.-"" | | \/// | '||' `._.' | |______________|_____|_______||________________________________________________ mGk _| _____________________________________________________________________________________ | Hmm... gdzie mogę | | .8888b, dostać kopię tego? | | .88888888888 | | 88888" _ / CD jest na moim biurku. | | 8"____'_\|| / Możesz sobie wziąć. ___ _ _ ___ _ _ _ | | |/_\ ; a|| / _ \| | | |/ __| || | || | ||". `-'D ,._,-._ / | (_) | |_| | (__| __ |_|| | |\_/ ,' .' ) / \___/ \___/ \___|_||_(_)| | \ `-. .' ,-`./ ,/`-._ | | | \ ) ,',". | | '._ | | `|_|----' ( ,' ( e_ ,',' `-. | | _|_`. ) ((8 `-'_) | | `-. | | ,' `.`8. ( |` d88 | | `-. | | | | 88 ) | d88bd8. ,',' `. | | | | `8 ( | "88888' | | | | | | | 8. `'. |"" | | | | | | | 88 |_-.| ,',' | | | | | 88 ,' `-.) _.-'\ | | ,' | | | | 88 ..; `. `. _,' )= \ \| .-' | | | | 88 | | `. `..' _,-'= = \ """""""""""""""""". | | | | 8' | | ,' ,'_._= = = \ ," ," ". | | |___|__| | |\ _,' `._,'"" )= = = \ ," ," ". | | `---`_[] | | `'. _.'"= = _.-' ".__,"______________," | | | \ | | | `. _.' \_.-"" | | \/// | '||' `._.' | |_______________|_____|_______||________________________________________________ mGk _|

_______________________________________________________________________________________ | | | Szefie, musisz coź zrobić. ,d8888. | | Greg i reszta technicznych marnują 88888888888. | | czas pracy na granie _`788888 | | po sieci. `. ||/_`____`8 | | `. ||, ; /_\| | | _._ `. C`-' ,"|| | | _.-""-. `-. ____ '`. \_/| | | ,' `-.,' __`. ._,' / | | `-. `-. `,-.: / | | | ``-._ , ; /*: '-----|_|' | | `-.-",-. `/_,'-. ,'_|_ | | ( G ,e,' ,8',' `. | | `| ,8P"`. 88 | | | | | "' ,' 8' | | | | | ,' ,8 | | | | _,;`-._| 88 | | | | ,'""". ,' `. b , 88 | | | | | `.' `.P ,' 88 | | | | | | , 8`._________ _.-. ,' 88 | | | | | | \ 8| _..-' `==) ,' `8 | | | | | | \ 8|__.-"`.`. ,==) ,' |__|___| | | | |, ;""""' ;_;. `==) /""""\ []_'---' | | | | \ __.-`XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX | / | | | | | \ _..-""| ____ | | | \\\/ | | | `""""""""""""". `| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |-. | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | `.___________________| | | | | | | |____________|____|_______|__|____________________________ |_________________|____ mGk _| _______________________________________________________________________________________ | No, nie wspomnę już o tym | | że gry w które grają są ,d8888. | | przepełnione przemocą, są krwawe 88888888888. | | oraz płytkie moralnie. _`788888 | | \ ||/_`____`8 | | \ ||, ; /_\| | | _._ \ C`-' ,"|| | | _.-""-. `-. ____ '`. \_/| | | ,' `-.,' __`. ._,' / | | `-. `-. `,-.: / | | | ``-._ , ; /*: '-----|_|' | | `-.-",-. `/_,'-. ,'_|_ | | ( G ,e,' ,8',' `. | | `| ,8P"`. 88 | | | | | "' ,' 8' | | | | | ,' ,8 | | | | _,;`-._| 88 | | | | ,'""". ,' `. b , 88 | | | | | `.' `.P ,' 88 | | | | | | , 8`._________ _.-. ,' 88 | | | | | | \ 8| _..-' `==) ,' `8 | | | | | | \ 8|__.-"`.`. ,==) ,' |__|___| | | | |, ;""""' ;_;. `==) /""""\ []_'---' | | | | \ __.-`XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX | / | | | | | \ _..-""| ____ | | | \\\/ | | | `""""""""""""". `| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |-. | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | `.___________________| | | | | | | |____________|____|_______|__|____________________________ |_________________|____ mGk _| _______________________________________________________________________________________ | | | Pan tu jest szefem. Pan ,d8888. | | musi coś zrobić 88888888888. | | z tym natychmiast! _`788888 | | `. ||/_`____`8 | | `. ||, ; /_\| | | _._ `. C`-' ,"|| | | _.-""-. `-. ____ '`. \_/| | | ,' `-.,' __`. ._,' / | | `-. `-. `,-.: / | | | ``-._ , ; /*: '-----|_|' | | `-.-",-. `/_,'-. ,'_|_ | | ( G ,e,' ,8',' `. | | `| ,8P"`. 88 | | | | | "' ,' 8' | | | | | ,' ,8 | | | | _,;`-._| 88 | | | | ,'""". ,' `. b , 88 | | | | | `.' `.P ,' 88 | | | | | | , 8`._________ _.-. ,' 88 | | | | | | \ 8| _..-' `==) ,' `8 | | | | | | \ 8|__.-"`.`. ,==) ,' |__|___| | | | |, ;""""' ;_;. `==) /""""\ []_'---' | | | | \ __.-`XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX | / | | | | | \ _..-""| ____ | | | \\\/ | | | `""""""""""""". `| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |-. | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | `.___________________| | | | | | | |____________|____|_______|__|____________________________ |_________________|____ mGk _| _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ | _ ___ | | / \|\| | ,d88888b._ | | \_/| |_|_ ,d8888888888. | | Skopali ci tyłek _ _____ ___ _ ___ | ,""""788888888 | | nieprawdaż?? / \(_ _/| ||/ | | ||_|| | | / `7888. | | \_/__)/__|_||\ _|_|^|| ||___|_ o ,-. 8888 | | _._ / ,' `-. (_ /,-._`8' | | _.-""-. `-. ____ / ; _ ` / ;`(_ / ) _.-. | | ,' `-.,' __`. ,' `. /e', ,' .' ! | | `-. `-. `,-.: ; :8888 / _ | | ``-._ , ; /*: `:""' / ,' ` | | `-.-",-. `/_,'-. ___/`--'| | | ( G ,e,' ,-' ;8b.' `---...________________ _.___ | | `| ,8P"`. .' 88P ||" ===' | | | "' ,' | ___ ,8 ___ _______________||"`=" | | | ,' |||`+'| 88 |`+'| ,-'' | | _,;`-._| |||_|_|,88 |_|_| ,' | | ,'""". ,' `. b , || 888 / | | | `.' `.P ,' || d888 ,' | | | | , 8`._________ _.-. ,' || 8888 / | | | | \ 8| _..-' `==) ,' || 8888 | | | | | \ 8|__.-"`.`. ,==) ,' ||____`88'_____| | | | |, ;""""' ;_;. `==) /""""\ \|_____[_]_____| | | | | \ __.-`XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX . [ | | | | | \ _..-""| ____ | | | [ | | | | `""""""""""""". `| | .| [ | | | | | | | | .A | | | | |-. | | | || | | | | | | | | | || | | | `.___________________| | | | .| .|| | | |____________|____|_______|__|____________________________ |_______|______|_|______|________________________ mGk _|

_ _ * R E C I P E F O R A H A P P Y L I F E * _ _ ( \/ ) ( \/ ) \ / | /) \ / \/ TAKE | /_ WHOLE MONTHS, \/ CLEAN THEM THOROUGHLY OF ALL BITTERNESS, RUMORS, HATE, AND JEALOUSY; IN OTHER WORDS, MAKE THEM AS FRESH AND AS CLEAN AS POSSIBLE. ____________ _____________ (____________;=============\ `^^^^^^^^^^^^` NOW CUT EACH MONTH INTO 28, 30, OR 31 DIFFERENT PARTS-- BUT DON'T MAKE UP THE WHOLE BATCH AT ONCE... INSTEAD PREPARE IT ***ONE DAY*** AT A TIME. MIX WELL EACH DAY: .-. .-----------------. (( )) ONE PART OF FAITH, :._________________.: \ / | | | ONE OF PATIENCE, | | | | | | ONE OF COURAGE, \ / | `._____________.' | ONE OF WORK, ADD ONE PART EACH OF HOPE, FAITHFULNESS, GENEROSITY, AND KINDNESS; __ (__) BLEND WITH: .:::. || .:::. [| G | || ONE PART PRAYER, [| | .:::. | D | #-/__\ | P | [| | `---' | | ONE PART MEDITATION, `---' | M | | | `---' (@)(@) AND ONE GOOD DEED. ` ' SEASON THE WHOLE WITH A DASH OF GOOD SPIRIT, A SPRINKLE OF FUN, A PINCH OF PLAY, AND A CUPFUL OF GOOD HUMOR. ._ _____,_ POUR ALL OF THIS INTO A VESSEL OF LOVE. \` =|D) T =|^ COOK THOROUGHLY OVER RADIANT JOY `-----' ( ) GARNISH WITH SMILES ____________.---(----. `----------|`--------'| AND SERVE WITH QUIETNESS, | | | | UNSELFISHNESS, AND CHEERFULNESS `--------' AND YOU ARE BOUND TO HAVE A HAPPY LIFE. (artwork by j.stark) ~ Proverbs 3:6 ~